It’s not your thoughts or emotions that keep you in the cycle of suffering, it’s your constant struggle and rejection of them that does. Non-acceptance of ‘what is’ just creates resistance within and it is this resistance that causes so much suffering and it also what stops a process of healing from happening.
Anyone who is stressed and mentally exhausted has got there through struggling with ‘what is’, through trying to force things to be different than they are. The people who constantly worry and stress are mainly those who are arguing with ‘what is’ be in their inner state or the outside world.
If you’re open to any outer or inner state then there is no struggle.
Less struggle = Less suffering, Less struggle = Thoughts and emotions change naturally. You can’t force or create a particular state through struggle or personal will, this just creates more of what you are trying to get rid of and just mentally drains you. You can’t change the outside world by getting mad at it, it won’t stop raining because you want it to and that woman at work won’t act differently than she is, no matter how much you wish her to. The outside world, life and others act as they do, less stress and worry comes through understanding this one fact and realising that life won’t always go your way and that people won’t always act how you want them to. The outside and others don’t cause stress, it is your none acceptance of how things are that does.
This is also true if you suffer in any way, it is your non-acceptance of your current state that causes so much extra suffering. It doesn’t feel great to feel down, angry, fearful, irritable, anxious or any other state you may find yourself in. But trust me, if you just fall right into your current state and don’t try and feel any different than you do, then you won’t suffer the same as if you battle with it, also the complete acceptance of your current state, allows your mind and body to start the process of healing.
Be open to any state
My own recovery from anxiety came when I saw enough to give up this fight to control and change how I felt. The same thoughts and feelings were there for a while, but I just lost interest in them and without my interest, without the constant fighting, the constant struggle I started to feel some peace and I came out of these thoughts and emotions far quicker. They felt lighter, less serious and had less impact.
If a person was able to no longer fear any state they were in then recovery is inevitable. It is your fear of the state you are in, the story you put around it, the constant struggle to feel different than you do. So much suffering is self-created through lack of understanding, yet we think it is an outside force doing this to us, it is not. So let go and have trust that your mind and body knows how to heal itself without your constant attempts at manipulation.
Someone put this as a reply to a similar message on my twitter account, which is so true.
“Imagine a world where we witness thoughts without becoming them & experience feelings without being overwhelmed by them.”