Posts From Archive: September 29, 2008

Why does my anxiety seem to get worse?

anxiety getting worse

Hello everyone,

The title is just something that has cropped up a lot recently and I wanted to cover. Before I do a few words. Firstly I am going away for a week in a month, just a holiday and Candie will be moderating the blog for me while I am away and maybe helping beyond that. All comments are moderated, as I don’t want mixed messages coming through or people promoting their useless affiliate products on here, which they keep trying. I also want people to be helpful and supportive, which is very easy to moderate, as we have a very nice bunch of people on here. Candie also takes the time out to answer a lot of people and is very helpful and someone I trust a lot, so thanks for helping me Candie.

Secondly I am starting some voulantry work next month. Its on hospital radio and two evenings a week. I think most or each hospital do it. You get to chat with patients, ask what they want played and learn all about how to work in the studio and eventually get your own slot. It is something I am very interested in and can’t wait to get started.

OK todays post came from a post on the blog, which went something like ‘How do I get rid of this thing’ The ‘thing’ being anxiety. I must admit, when I first suffered, I did know know what the hell was up with me and just thought it would pass like a cold. Well obviously it did not and then I started to worry and obsess about it, especially when everywhere I turned nobody was giving me any answers. So a lot of people do believe they have been unlucky and question why did anxiety come to them.

Well anxiety does not chose certain people, it is not something that you just get like a cold. Anxiety is the result of your body being over worked, be it through long hours, stress at work, a problem or collection of them that you worry about. You over work your body and it breaks down, your nerves have been battered so much. that they go ‘bad’ if you like. Anything you buy, be it a blender, a vacuum and yes even a car. If you work that beyond its capabilitys it will break down or begin to clunk and run bad. Your body is the same, so anxiety is not a ‘it’, it is not something your body wants to go through, it is telling you it can’t work with the pressure you are putting it under. That is why it is so important to take your symptoms with a pinch of salt, not to get stressed or worry about them, as again you are working your body far too hard, a body that is crying out to be left alone. The easiest way to not worry or get stressed about how you feel is to understand more about why you feel like you do and this is the reason I try to explain a lot in my book and on here.

Some people say they feel instantly better when they have read the book or a post on here. I say yes, because you understand why now, it does not scare you as much, so you worry less and don’t get as stressed by the way you feel. The more of an understanding I received, (most of it I had to work out by myself, pre internet days) then the better I felt and the less respect I gave to my symptoms. I had the same symptoms for a while and that point is important, as a lot of people hope they will feel better overnight.

Changing the daily habit of worry and obsessing how I felt helped me to recover, it gave space for me to progress. How could I ever get better while I still worried daily and stressed everyday about how I felt, ‘trying to fight and think my way better’, it was impossible, but something most people do without the right information, scrambling around daily for answers, worrying and stressing about how they feel, watching months go by without any progress, wondering if this hell will ever leave them. That person was me also and would still be me to this day if I had not educated myself enough.

I hope there is something there for everyone


If you would like more information on over coming anxiety, then visit my site anxietynomore. If you would like to know more about my book then visit At Last a Life

What keeps us in the cycle of anxiety?

anxiety cycle

Firstly just a few words from me. I am working on my book at the moment, as things are in the pipeline to help it reach out to more people (more if this delvops later) so I want it to be as good as it can be and I always keep a document named ‘Book updates’ and one of the most helpful places to have new ideas is by what people ask or write on this blog. If something comes up time and time again then it needs covering. I also had an idea of a new chapter that would be from people who post here/email me on how much progress they have made or their full recovery. I always say the more people that have stories of their own recovery, that others can relate to the better. In my own search all those years ago I had a massive interest in reading about anyone that had come through and I think this new chapter will really benefit people. It will not only be that they have come through or improved dramatically, but what really helped them to do this.

Anyway I am halfway through doing this and this is the reason I have not being around to post much recently. So thanks to all those who have replied to others as I have noticed one or two new posters recently, so welcome. Most people like to just read and stay in the background without posting and that’s fine. But to all those that do post and help and support others ‘A big thank you’ as it helps keep the blog going with me only having limited time to put into it and through the emails I receive I know how much this blog helps others and without the people who do post and support it would not be what it is.

OK on to todays post

The title above is nothing new, but I wanted to add a conversation I had with someone recently, as it may relate to a lot of people and help them understand better as to why they do stay in the cycle, which always helps to reverse it. Many regular posters and readers may have come to this conclusion with things I have said in the past, but we get so many new visitors each day that I really wanted to add it.

OK I was talking with someone the other day about his anxiety and how it came about. He said at the time that he was put under a lot of pressure at work and one or two things in his home life were also a factor, although he could not really remember what. He said ‘I have cut my hours down, the other problems no longer exist, so why do I still feel like this?’

I said that just like me when I first suffered; that you now have a new problem and this is the problem that is keeping your anxiety going. To which he replied ‘What new problem’?

I replied ‘Anxiety’ These feelings have become your new problem and this is the reason you stay in the cycle. I further explained that he may have worried about his job, the problems at home initially, with which he agreed. Right OK you put your body under too much stress and worry and it sort of broke down and you ended up with anxiety. Now what you are doing is worrying and stressing about how you feel and this is the reason the anxiety stays around, it has a new worry to feed on.

I did exactly the same, in fact my initial problem did not matter, this anxiety was far bigger than what brought it on. I worried daily about it, fought it, tried everything to make the damn thing go away. How could I ever recover putting this much stress and worry on myself. I could not.

He said ‘I really understand what your saying here and I realise that I am doing all of the above and why I am getting nowhere’

So I told him you cannot hope to banish these feelings, so why not live with them the best you can. If you decide to do this then you will not add anymore fuel to the fire. You will begin to break a cycle. Anxiety is like a fire that you throw petrol on. It wont stop until you take away its fuel. It may burn for a while, but it will began to dampen if you stop feeding it. I did the opposite for 10 years and it got me nowhere, I understand fully now why I got worse and not better. If my body would speak it would have said ‘Paul just leave me alone and I will heal myself’.

I hope people can relate to that conversation and it helps in some way.


If you would like more information on over coming anxiety, then visit my site anxietynomore. If you would like to know more about my book then visit At Last a Life