Happy Christmas and a Happy New Year

Hi Everyone, I just firstly wanted to wish everyone a Happy Christmas and best wishes for next year as this will be me signing of until then.

This also gives me time to reflect on the last year and certain observations. I will say in the last year I have seen a shift in people’s attitude to anxiety. We have also had some recent high profile cases on depression and other issues which seems to have woke people up that there can be other problems out there and attitudes have to change. Recently many famous people have come out to speak out on the subject and organizations have been set up like State of Mind, which helps ex rugby players with mental health problems.

Mental health is no longer a stigma, no longer two words to be avoided and it is something that many, many people suffer from at some point in their life, be it anxiety, depression or anything else. It certainly does not mean you are going crazy or this is you for ever, so many people do get the right help and move on with their lives. You will be amazed at the people who find out what I do and say, ‘Oh yes I once felt like that’ or ‘My sister suffers with that’. It is extremely common and thankfully attitudes are now changing.

On the blog itself, well it has been a very successful year with so many coming back to say they have recovered or are well on their way. That is something I never tire of hearing and it is great that people come back and share their stories. Many don’t post on the blog, but I get as many emails telling me the same thing. I even had someone telling me that their doctor pointed them  to the blog, which is something everyone here should be proud of. It really has become a great little community that helps so many people, many who don’t actually post, but just come and lurk and find comfort in what others have to say.

To finish it does take time to recover and you can slowly see people’s posts get more positive and educated as time goes by, until they are then helping and advising others. I see many come here distressed and at the end of their teather. But all you can do is sit back and let them learn gradually, I wish I could wave a magic wand and everyone would be o.k. I have said in the past the one thing that kept me in the cycle for so many years was trying to find that magic sentence or pill to make it all go away, it was just a battle each day from when I woke, to when I went to bed.

Finally as someone said the other week, I have slowed down on posts recently as I want them to be really helpful and not just post for the sake of posting. The next one I promise will be on the 2nd January, one that I am sure will help. I should also have more time to answer here also, again I have been very busy on something which is just about completed now, so I should have more time.

Thanks for everyone who has posted here, especially those that have advised, you will never know how much that means to people.

Happy Christmas and 2012, lets make it the best year yet

Paul

64 Responses to “Happy Christmas and a Happy New Year”

  1. Sydney Carton Says:

    Just to say thank you for being there for us all Paul throughout the past year and for the continued success of the blog – Happy Christmas

  2. jackie Says:

    Merry Christmas to you Paul and thank you for all the blog posts and advice you give.
    Merry Christmas everyone xxxxx love Jackie

  3. jc Says:

    thank you paul and to all those who write on the blog to help others .it has been a great comfort in times when i feel i am struggling happy christmas and a happy and healthy new year to everyone xxx

  4. angela Says:

    merry christmas i look fo ward to the 2nd :)

  5. Fran Says:

    Happy Christmas to one and all.
    Thanks to Paul for this site which has been a lifesaver. I am away at friends in Cornwall for Christmas at my best friends house with my husband and daughter. I did this 2 years ago and was so anxious i could hardly function.
    This year it is better….not perfect but better. There are other people staying who i don’t know that well and i have managed to talk and interact with them which is something that would have terrified me 2 years ago.
    Through this site i have learned how to cope better and to get my own space when i need it so i don’t overload myself.
    This site has helped me to realise that even though i am not my old self, i have got so much better. There is no way i could have done this before, so thank you paul.
    Hope this is a bit of encouragement
    Happy Xmas and a hopeful New Year
    Fran x

  6. Zoe Broadbent Says:

    Hi Paul & Everyone!

    Merry Christmas! and A Happy New Year!

    This is my first Christmas Anxiety Free and Panic Free! My Dream has come True! Thank You so much for your Help I am now Helping others to in Recovering from Anxiety!

    XxXx

  7. Matt Says:

    Merry Christmas everyone!! Hope everyone is doing well. I’ve been doing well and been trying to get my son’s kindle to work correctly. That’s been a pain in the butt, lol. Anyways, have a great day!

  8. Paul David (Admin) Says:

    Thanks for all the messages, I really need to lose some waist after xmas, been lazy with the excercise and wont mention the food and drink side.

    Anyone who has been thinking of getting fit, you wont regret it, it really is the best stress busting, anti depressant out there, does wonders for your physical and mental health.

    Take care and we will keep the positivity and advise going in 2012

    Paul

  9. Angela Says:

    Hi Paul and everyone!

    Merry Christmas to you and a very Happy new year!!!

    Thanks for all the support you give people Paul, I know you hear this ALL the time but if it wasn’t for this site I would still be struggling so much. I can only say, to everyone who is still struggling and doubting, THIS IS THE ONLY WAY YOU WLL GET BETTER! I have gone to see a few councillors and I have pointed them your way because they have NO CLUE, NONE. In fact, they make it worse a lot of the time. This doesn’t mean they aren’t helpful but most of them don’t know how to deal with anxiety and tell you to take a few deep breaths. I have however found them helpful in other ways and also they have made me face bad feelings and made me less afraid of bad feelings. So not awful all round.

    DON’T despair people.

    Happy holidays! xxxx

  10. ian Says:

    Posted on previous thread, but will reiterate here.

    Merry Christmas everyone, my very best wishes to all of you. May 2012 bring you all peace.

    Thank you Paul especially (and obviously).

    Ian

  11. angela Says:

    i have had a bad couple of days, im putting it down to the stress of christmas, im having thoughts of “whats the point” my life is crap!! and what can i do tomorrow when i get up? i dont understand why i am deperessed when im not depressed!!!!!! i feel good but when this anxiety kicked in its like i have to have a plan for me to be able to cope if that makes sense?
    although on my good days i just dont care.. im getting frustrated and starting to let the thoughts consume me at the moment which i have to say is extrememly annoying as i no how to cope with these thoughts by now.. i am worried that they are back again.. i just want them to go away and me to be free of anxiety as i can see my new life in the distance. sorry to start on such a negative note.. any help of advice would be a great help :)

  12. Diane Says:

    hi angela,I know what your saying,I have been doing well,I am the same on good days anxiety comes and I just dont feed into it, but I had to fly to visit my parents and was anxious when I arrrived, I relaxed yesterday, but as I am out of my comfort zone and routine anxiety is back, and along with it what ifs and self awareness to much, I think we just have to keep going with our recovery, we can have good days and they will get more and try to just accept how we feel and try not to over analyse everything, I know easier said than done, I spent today bursting into tears, feeling guilty and over aware, tomorrow is another day and I am going to try to just accept the anxiety and focus outwards instead of inwards and look at what I have acheived so far, I think paul wrote that when we have been doing ok and all of a sudden axiety is back,it can feel like how it did when we were at our worst, we must try to accept it and not get back into the visciuos cycle, Ihope tomorrow is better for both of us, take care x

  13. DCYL Says:

    Diane / Angela (and others)

    I hope everyone had a good holiday. I am starting to understand why Paul says we need to “live our life” regardless of anxiety. I didn’t have particular “tough” days. I did have some “fear” feelings that popped up out of the blue. I had to manage my way through that a bit.

    I also had many feelings / thoughts that came through my head. As Diane says, the holidays tend to break our “routines”. For example, I did not have to work the past four days. I was wondering / worried what I was going to do Friday. What I ended up doing was playing some sports that I normally do on Saturday. That left Saturday as a bit of an empty day. Sunday, I had a get together with a cousin. Tonight I was out.

    The feelings and thoughts were a little out of the blue and I had to let them ride a bit. It wasn’t easy as they were strong but I made it through. This weekend taught me that many of us do recover to a certain level, especially if we have routines we go by. However, the real breakthrough is just going through all of these odds and ends situations that pop up.

    Keep strong everyone. My friend and I talked last week and holidays tend to bring stress. It could be shopping. For me, it’s a personal perception that I don’t have traditional family wide gatherings and that can get you down. Under normal circumstances, probably not a big deal. When you’re a little more self focused, the feeling gets magnified and blown way out of proportion.

    The upside is that my get together with my cousin this past Sunday was an attempt to get our families celebrating more together. So in reality, I have nothing to worry about. :)

  14. JAN TURNER Says:

    Hi all, have had a tough xmas, and God knows how I managed to cook Xmas dinner without breaking down, my legs were like jelly!! Had to attend party last nite which frightened the hell out of me, sat there and literally couldnt speak for anxiety/depression. Was about to call the Sams but decided to go to bed instead. My xmas wish is to recover from this wicked illness, it has robbed me of myself. Sorry to be so negative, any help appreciated.
    Jan

  15. John J Says:

    Hello all, I hope you have had a good Christmas time.

    I didn’t want to come on here again to ask for reassurance or moan about how I am feeling and I am disapointed in myself for actually giving in. (I know I shouldn’t be disapointed, it doesn’t matter)

    I have just finished reading Pauls book. It is great. Everything makes sense to me. Whilst I am reading it, I am totally reassured and I can see exactly where I am going wrong and the things I need to change. When I read it, it lifts my spirits and makes me feel that I can beat this. It actually makes me feel like I can recover.

    But then a few short hours later, I find myself in the drip of despair and anxiety again. I’ll give some typical examples of things that have happened to me over the last few days and I’d like to know if anyone else gets this or has any ideas about how I can make changes.

    On Thurday I decided that I would get up early and go to the barbers and do some Christmas shopping. I got up, but didn’t really feel like it and thought, “I just need to do this anyway”. I got into the car and drove into town. Driving past te barbers I looked into the window and could see that there was quite a queue. I started to get nervous as I hate waiting in the barbers, I don’t even know why. I then could not find a parking space anywhere. I drove around for about half an hour and I could not get parked. I considered parking some way away and walking, but the thought of doing that just made me feel odd. I just couldn’t get out of the car.
    I was feeling so unreal and spacey that I just couldn’t face walking down the road, let alone going to the barbers or the shops. In the end I drove around for an hour before going back home. I felt totally useless and annoyed with myself. It felt like the effort I had made to leave the house was spoiled by my inability to get out of the car.

    Then, Christmas eve, my wife took my two older children out to deliver some gifts and I was left at home with the baby. That day I had been feeling good and I hardly gave anxiety a thought. I was actually starting to enjoy my day and I got a good feeling about Christmas. Then as soon as the wife left, and I was alone with the baby, I started to feel odd. I started to get scared and shake. “What if I hurt the baby?” “What if I go mad and do something crazy” I was so afraid because the thoughts were not what I wanted. They upset me so much. I got so scared, it felt as if my hands were not mine, that they could do something crazy at any minute. I had to hold my hands in my pockets! My wife was away for an hour and the whole time, I was wishing her back. I tried to accept the feelings, but because I was alone I was so afraid I could not accept. I spent the whole time watching myself rather than enjoying plying with the baby, and by the time my wife came back I was so relived and shaky that it took me nearly an hour to calm back down. Again, I was so annoyed that I had not been able to accept and I felt that i had not even ‘been there’ but was so busy watching myself.

    That night, I was able to calm down again and watch a film and I felt so silly that I could not do a simple thing liek look after my own child. I’d never had this problem with the other two, so why have I suddenly become afraid now?

    Christmas day, again I experienced great fear when in the kitchen at my mothers. She was cutting food with a knife and i just had to get out of the kitchen and sit in the other room. I was so afraid that I could just ‘snap’ that I could only focus on myself and the knife because I thought that if I didn’t watch myself I would go crazy!

    Thiis subsided when I started to enjoy myself, but every now and then it would pop back up and I couldn’t go into the kitchen.

    The day after Christmas, I felt extreme anxiety in the morning and I had very bad depersonalisation. I just couldn’t connect with my emoptions and I felt so foggy. I decided that no matter how bad i felt, we would all go out for a walk along the seafront and I would take my mind off it and learn to use my new camera.
    When we got to the seafront, it was far busier then I’d thought it would be and this made me nervous. Combined with the depersonalisation, I felt as thought my eyes were two pin holes and my vision seemed to restricted.
    It was as if everything had closed in around me.

    I pushed through it, and took some great photos, but I couldn’t lose the feeling. That night when the children were going to bed, I just couldn’t stop thinking that I would suddenly snap. I had to hold on to the arms of my chair for reassurance. I was so worried that I would go crazy that it upset me greatly. I just could not find my way out of it to calm down. Eventually I did, but it kept flashing back and forth and it has really left me with te fear that I am going crazy or that I will never be better.

    Today I am thick with brain fog. I feel like I have no connection with my emotions. I am so worried that I am just ‘here’ but not feeling any of it.

    I know that there are setbacks, but I feel worse than i’ve felt in this whole last year of anxiety. I don’t drink caffeine, or alcohol, I take vitamins and I try to accept, but when it gets to me really feels like I’m going mad.
    How many times can a person feel like they are going to flip before they actually do?

    Wow! Reading that back, it really does sound like the ramblings of a madman, and if I read that before I knew what anxiety was, I’d say that the person writing it was not right!

    Has anyone else experienced feelings like this? And how can I go from feeling great, making plans, looking forward to an anxiety free life and actually feeling like I am making progress, to feeling like I’m worse than I ever have been?

    Sorry for the depressing Christmas post, but I just want to know if anyone else has such a range of anxiety. Feels like I’ve got every symptom and more!

  16. Matt Says:

    John..I have experienced everything you have and a whole lot worse. I am recovering and have good days and bad days, but more good days then bad now, which is nice. I can go some days without any anxiety and DP and feel great, and some days it comes right back. trust me when I say you aren’t going crazy, no matter how many times you think you will, you wont. It’s the condition that makes you feel that way.

    I would do the same things you did, make plans to beat this thing, then I wouldn’t follow through with it for some unknown fear that made no sense to me that i couldn’t grasp at the time. The more you try to understand it, the worse it’s going to get. All you have to understand is what paul wrote in his book and move on with your life, no matter how bad you feel and how weird the thoughts are. It is just a tired mind and your body is protecting you from yourself. That’s why you have all the unreality, weird DP sensations going on, your body is protecting you. There isn’t anything to be scared of, but because you are scared of these sensations and feelings, your body will go on to protect you even more.

    Allow whatever feelings and thoughts to come and don’t question them and try to figure it out. The more you can focus on your life, the more the anxiety and DP will fade, but it is going to take some time. Like paul says, you can’t force recovery to come to you, it comes to you by stepping out of the way and getting involved in your own life. Anyways, hope things go better for you.

  17. Michelle Z Says:

    John – Matt is spot on. You just have to let the thoughts and feelings be there and focus on whatever you need to be doing. I’ve also had everything you described…and more! And although I wouldn’t say I’m 100% recovered yet, I’m way better than I was a year ago at this time. It’s amazing what time and just living your life can do.

    At first, I would come on this blog several times a day for reassurance and/or pick up Paul’s book and do more reading … again for reassurance. But as time has passed, I’ve been able to go long periods of time without checking in. And you’ll get there, too. The point is that if it helps right now to read some of the positive blogs or Paul’s book to help you get through that’s okay. You’ll get to the point where you understand and you’ll just get on with living.

    You will not hurt your baby, yourself or anyone else. It’s just part of this condition…a very scary part for sure, but it’s only anxiety. Believe it or not, the day will come when you will have an odd thought and you will be able to laugh at it.

    Happy New Year to all! I hope to see each one of us coming on here in 2012 to post our story of full recovery!!

  18. Vic Says:

    Great post Paul! Happy Holidays to everyone. Enjoy the New Year!

    I myself am at a turning point in my life thanks to anxiety. I have been suffering off and on for about 3 years, but in these 3 years I have learned so much about myself ,and the past 2 months have been the most influential. I have become religious and am planning on starting to meditate and take better care of my self. And I am doing these things because I want to be a better person, not because of anxiety. Anxiety has only helped me realize the bigger meaning of life and how much more is out there, and for that I am grateful for anxiety becoming a part of my life. If my anxiety goes away great, but if not I still plan on becoming a better person and not letting the thoughts and feelings bother me anymore. Good luck to everyone in the New Year! as Paul said, make this the best year yet! Only you have the power to do so, do not let anything hold you back!

  19. Sinead Says:

    hey everyone!
    its been a few weeks i think since i posted because ive just been getting on with life :) i think i am so much better than a few months ago thanks to paul and everyones support on here! its weird-im now in a place where i would say im free from alot of the anxiety and depression some days are better than others but every day is a little better than the last.i feel like im in a crossroads in my life at the minute because at my worst i felt like my life was over and now i realise hang on its not and that feels a bit strange because ive never felt ive had so much power over where my future will go from here!i think its a mixture of the anxiety depression and the fact im finishing up at uni after 5 long years and suddenly i dont know where my life is headed now-i was always a planner before, perhaps thats even what triggered my anxiety!-the overwhelming fear of the unknown!
    so i feel so much better however i would never say im recovered because my mind is very much still focused on me, on anxiety, on how i feel-but that doesnt mean in my eyes im no-where near recovery-in fact i think it means im very close because i can be happy live a normal life and get on with things start new hobbies do everything “anxious” free people can do even though most of the time the focus is on me, and i get irrational fears/racing thoughts every now and then!i obviously wish i had never went through this bu i have an so what-i will be stronger from it.it makes me sad sometimes because i struggle with conversation sometimes and have lost all my social confidence but the more i get out and about the easier it is and even when i say something stupid in social situations or worse have nothing to say at all because the anxietys playing tricks on me i just swallow my pride and just realise this is the way its gonna be for a wee while, its not going to heal overnight nothing does :) i find it hard to hear people talk about mental illness as well or watch anything on tv about it because ive went through this but despite finding it hard i just continue watching tv anyway-i will not shy away from this illness or certain parts of the world because they remind me of my own anxiety-only by standing my ground and learning to live life in a scary world will truly mean ive recovered.
    to everyone suffering badly use here for as much support as you need, it truly is amazing and dont worry about using it too much or never being able to do without it as a “crutch” because when you’re ready to just go it alone you will be able to-even if you think you’ll never reach that place.same as michelle above i dont feel the need to check in all the time-in fact i only do because i think sometimes me not checking in is a fear that reading about anxiety will “trigger” me off again so i check in to show myself that i can read about anxiety and not have a meltdown :) i used be on here multiple times a day so never question wonder fear how or when or how you’ll get there because you will
    best piece of my advice was what my dad said to me when i was at my worst-i was crying and said how can i ever expect it to get better if no part of me ever thinks it will-and he just said it can-even if you dont believe it or cant see it it can and it will
    and it does :)
    the tiniest shred of hope is enough to help one day be better than the last…and day by day-very very slowly it changes-but dont sit round waiting for it too just get on with your life and it will i promise
    happy new year to everyone and please if yous can do some positive mental thoughts/prayers for me in my exams-anxiety and revision for finals arent compatible apparently-oh well positive mental attitude!
    thanks to everyone and best of luck to everyone in the coming year

  20. Matt Says:

    by the way, I heard this pretty cool analogy the other day that this guy told me that totally relates to anxiety. he said if you were on the titanic, you wouldn’t be thinking, “why is this ship sinking?” You’d be trying to get the hell off the boat! What I mean, is that when you know what created it, and why it’s happening, don’t continue to analyze and question, just live your life and it will go away. Anyways, hope everyone is having a good day!

  21. Elaine Says:

    JAN I HAVE BEEN WERE YOU ARE NOW AND ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION TOGETHER IS AWFULL. BUT YOU WILL GET THERE I HAVE AND I HAVE HAD A LOVELY XMAS . YOU WILL BE FINE XXX

  22. lorry Says:

    Hi All

    I wish everyone a very happy and anxiety free new year. I have been on here previously and experienced a very heppy and totally freeing recovery, but lately I have been experiencing some very strange and worrying symptoms. I have had a particularly bad year stress wise and have in the past 8 months been workign full timem, which is something i though i would never be able to do !!. i have 2 kids and a house hubby etc .. all the ususal stuff. But i am thinking after the year i have had that i am not coping well with it all and its catching me up, and stress automatically converts itself to anxiety with me , at least i recognise it now and have the tools to deal with it. i have very different symptoms than i have had before and that is owrrying me that there is somethign else wrong!. Maybe at th back of my mind because a friend has just hada brain tumour and i am aware of this, that maybe my brian is going into overdrive and turning it in on me. It sounds all so silly when i am typing it out. I have founda job that i love and poeple that are great to work with , but is it all too much?… an d then i start overanalyzing everything. I havent been sleeping well and have been drinking a lot , what with xmas and everything. I need to stop the alcohol. take things down a step and sort out my head, but i am going to the docs to maek sure, or am i just being silly ! i am not so sure about anything any more, just need soem adice and reassurance.x

  23. Sophia Says:

    I had anxiety all my life though i never realised the way i felt was very different from the way others felt…that actually shaped my character which was infact ”never hurt anyone” ”keep away from all potential dangers” these dangers may include anything that popped up in my mind..being wary of anything around…
    if i have a thought it would multiply within minutes and i could feel the effects of it and i cudnt snap out of it..and i was under depression for many years and i felt very inadequate..
    all because of my thoughts and nothing else..it would limit all my capabilities…
    i was in a state where i cannot think and i feel right on spot with people..i would mumble with words..if i had a wrong thought i would crucify myself for having that thought as those thoughts were randomly popped up in my mind and not through proper observation
    the moment i start observing my surroundings the focus immediately falls on me, my actions, behaviour, thoughts and finally i’m trapped and could snap out…
    i have learned a lot about anxiety but, now i have become so self aware that i couldnt snap out of it..
    i am so full of dread , dont know exactly what i’m dreading..
    i thought i had come out of it completely as i had a lot of ups and downs n could brush them off easily…
    now when i look at a person , when i’m trying to grasp what he is saying i feel i’m simply staring at him and the focus falls on my thoughts and thats it i have lost track…its been repeating more often…
    it was easier initially but the more i recover i feel more self aware.. i fear i’m back to my old self…which is terrible…!
    Pls help…

  24. Sophia Says:

    Hi Paul

    hey can u post something on being in a state where all u can hear is ur mind chatter…i can carry on with my life there is no DP but i feel totally meaningless with my life as i couldnt snap out of my mind chatter if i try to listen to the other person then the focus is on me..this is a terrible state more than how i felt dp…
    I would like to add something until i found thsi site i never knew what i had been experiencing was anxiety..as i always had continuous mind chatter which i thought was normal..n i would create a scenario where i might have to face some difficult situations then i may plan for myself to survive that..this was there always …n i would come back successfully..i would have been very enthusiatic and would have interacted more than usual..

    but now i realise that was me acting out myself…perceiving situations and enacting where none exicted sometimes…its my wrong percetion n imagination…wasnt that anxiety?

    not that i realise all my life i had anxiety i dont know how to live life without it..i have never known life without a preconcieved thought..
    can u imagine only when i had dp where i couldnt sense emotions and couldnt process thoughts i could live life peacefully and take life as it comes….

    i dont know what i should be talking about? i cant even say a hi to someone if i see someone on the spot..i may have to tune in to what i should be speaking…i dont have the urge to talk to anyone i’m always following what the mind has to say..i feel like its leading me rather than me leading…its so constant that i cant snap out of it..

    can u make me understand what i’m going through? as i had been always like that…!

  25. John J Says:

    Thanks for the replies,

    Does acceptance come all at once or is it a gradual process that takes time?

    Can you start by accepting little bits and move on to bigger things, or does it all need to be at once?

  26. John J Says:

    Thanks for the replies.

    I’m giving acceptance a new fresh attempt. I think I would get to a point where I felt ok, having accepted the feelings and they went away. Then just give up and when the anxiety came again I would crumble.

    The problem I have is that I start accepting, allowing it to flow, and I still get short bursts of panic coming through, or I cling onto a thought that I was supposed to be accepting. When i realise that I am doing this, I remind myself to accept again.

    am I doing this right, because surely if I was accepting it properly, the panic or thoughts would not be able to get through. I manage to pull it back on track but then I worry that it was able to creep in. Is this normal when you start accepting? Do you still get little bursts of anxiety trying to get in?

    The other thought I had today, I was watching a film when suddenly the intrusive thoughts popped into my head. I suddenly felt that i would jump up and grab my wife. I knew this was just another intrusive thought as I have has so many of these in the past. I knew that if I feared it, it would start the sycle, so i started to accept that it was there and not to react to it.
    This was so hard, because I could not fully let go. I knew what i had to do, and i was doing it, but every now and then I would let it get to me.

    It felt as if I was suddenly thrust into the cockpit of a plane with no training. There was no rehearsal or safe zone. I just had to do it, but that added to my fear. The thought, “What if accepting is not for me? What if I accept and actually carry this out?” I could see exactly where i was going wrong and I was making more of a situation out of it.

    I accepted that the thoughts would be there and they should not scare me. But I don’t think it was full acceptance. I was on about 50 – 60 per cent accepting.

    Any one else found this?

  27. Paul David (Admin) Says:

    Sophia says:Hi Paul

    hey can u post something on being in a state where all u can hear is ur mind chatter…i can carry on with my life there is no DP but i feel totally meaningless with my life as i couldnt snap out of my mind chatter if i try to listen to the other person then the focus is on me..this is a terrible state more than how i felt dp…

    Sophia I promised to do the post 2 roads next, but the post after should really emlighten you on mind chatter, it will all be about this and how to come through it. I will say though, don’t try and turn it off, just live with it there and let it burn itself out, go outside, take a walk and just take in your surroundings. Trying to turn off mind chatter becomes a new mind chatter as you are trying to do something about it, hence you have more conversations. Mind chatter starts when all we do is spend our days trying to do something about the way we feel, we over think things and it becomes a habit. My next post about this should really help you, it is what got me through as it was a habit I suffered with.

    Paul

  28. Matt K Says:

    I posted this in another Blog, but thougt I would move it over here since its the most recent one:

    Hey Paul or anyone with experience with this,

    I havent been on the site in quite a while and feel that I am doing much better. I still have some social issues that I am trying to work on. Every once and awhile I will sweat on my forehead if I am really spun up and it embarrasses me. How do I go about getting over that fear of sweating in places that its not appropriate (Church, work, etc…..) and did you ever experience something similiar?

  29. JAN TURNER Says:

    Thank you Elaine for the encouragement. Have just seen my counsellor who says i am expecting too much of myself at the moment, he s probably right. Should have expected an increase in pressure over Xmas and New Year its very emotional,if your not feeling great.
    Janx

  30. JAN TURNER Says:

    Thank you Elaine for the encouragement. Have just seen my counsellor who says i am expecting too much of myself at the moment, he s probably right. Should have expected an increase in pressure over Xmas and New Year its very emotional,if your not feeling great.
    Janx
    PS. John, your thoughts are coming with great fear as your nerves are sensitised, its just a very frightening thought and you are reacting to it with fear, if you were not anxious and had the thought you would think it was ridiculous. I also have had irrational thoughts its because we are sensitive people and think the things that we would never do.

  31. Joe Says:

    Hello everyone, I just wanted to wish you all a great, worry free new year and for 2012 to be a year where you do things that you fear regurlary and live without worry!
    I’ve just come through a long setback which was really horrible, but now as I’ve moved on from it, I’m feeling even stronger and enlighthened because of it.
    And I’am really looking forward to the new year as I’m looking forward to continue improving and maybe in the process full recovery might just creep up on me. However after going through this last setback I really don’t mind when full recovery comes because I’m just enjoying living with how im feeling now and I think I understand my anxiety to the point now, where my symtoms are more annyoing than frightening.

    Regarding Mind chatter, I’ve suffered with this for a long time.
    Just like Pauls says it’s a habit we’ve created through our own overthinking about our anxiety and about daily things that our anxiety has made us overanalzye and worry about, so it’s becomes our 24/7 normal way of thinking. For e.g. worrying about what people think about you etc. And also because are nerves are so sensitive our mind will pick up on new things to worry about seemingly all the time.
    What I have done on my road to recovery to come to terms with this, is to completely let myself think in this overactive style, as if you continue to be anxious about it, your will always be anxious about it.
    Also I sometimes remind myself about what I’ve learnt for e.g. that my nerves are sentised so my mind will always try to worry about something unnessecary. When I ever do this helps me to stop me fearing my overthinking mind.
    Also with mind chatter I would like paul said focus on things in the present, like cooking doing coursework etc this helped to break the habit of always thinking about me. I know this very hard at times but you have to really preserve with it sometimes and your focus gradually becomes outward but don’t make your aim, just allow to naturally come to you.

    And Again Happy New year to Paul and everyone on the Blog!!!

  32. Rebecca Says:

    Happy christmas Paul and all on the Blog,
    I have really felt like i needed to come on here and chat to you guys, i have had a really difficult time recently and my anxiety well it has never been this bad. I know it has been exacerbated by recent events, about 6months ago i ended a 4 year relationship as i wasn’t very happy, i was living with him and i had to be so strong to end it. That brought on anxiety in me alot but recently it has just been really bad, i moved house and decided to live with 4 guys who then moved out after a few months because they had chosen a bigger house to live in, this then really shocked me, even though they invited me to join i wasn’t ready to move house again then i started a new relationship about 3 months ago and he just ended it just before christmas :( All of this has just not helped with my already anxious mind. My mind has been chattering all day and holding onto negative intrusive thoughts, i just feel like im in abit of a nightmare right now. This time round i am just finding it really hard just to let the thoughts go, i keep thinking im going mad and it is just so hard. I think all the changes i have recently gone through have just been very unsettling. I have continued to go to work but because i havn’t been sleeping very well, work has become difficult but when i am there i do put alot of my energy into it, it’s hard not to in my profession. I do sometimes feel very lonely in all this, like i just want to scream. I’ts hard because you can’t just talk to anyone about it. Has anyone got any suggestions?
    I am already attending councelling which is helpful but very expensive, this tends to help as i find talking about it helps me understand it better. I am trying to avoid taking any medication as i know how addictive it can be, i also made a mistake once by taking a anti- anxialitic tablet quite late at night so when it came to working the next day i was like a zombie, never doing that again!
    It is just so irrating, i do love my life in many ways but this has just really taken over recently :(

  33. Teresa Says:

    Hi All –
    Just thought I would pop in and give and seek some support.
    Rebecca –
    I have not gone down the medication route and as a rule i do not think it helps, you need to learn to develop your own ‘attitude’ or strength towards this. You need to find someone to talk to, not just a counsellor but a family member or friend if possible but if not come on here. If you can sort the ‘worries’ about the house out that will help – but if you are ‘blaming’ people for leaving you in the lurch over it – don’t waste the energy, sometimes people leave us down – it serves no purpose to keep ‘blaming’ them – they will have things happen to them too that they don’t like, just leave it go if you can it will help you. admire your own strength for ending the relationship you knew was not right. I am not sure what to tell you about the counselling – if it is expensive it could be a burden, but if you feel it is helping that is up to you – you have all the tools on here to recover. Have you had Paul’s book? Things will change.

    Joe – Great to hear of your new attitude, I love the line I’m really looking foward to continue improving and maybe in the process full recovery may just creep up on me … I really don’t mind when it comes because I’m enjoying living with how i feel now where my symptoms are more annoying than frightening. I have hit a turn up in the volume of my symptoms which I am beginning to be fooled by again – i have gained so much over 2011 with Paul and the blogs help I am so grateful, setback or reoccurence of the fear of the symptoms can be disappointing when fear returns but when you read of others who have been through it and resurfaced stronger again and with a positive and unfearful attitude, it remninds you of your own recovery – it reminds you that you will bob back up again and each time hopefully that bit stronger. So altho ‘now’ is not good as we recover we do get used to knowing that the strength of the fear diminishes with our attention to it, it can be difficult when you know that and then try and ‘control’ the symptoms by tiring to control your mind or circumstances but leaving go has to be the answer, freewheeling through life, lol! So at the moment, i was looking for my whatever attitude, I now realise I just have to wait for it to come back and get on with the symptoms for now – not pleasant but if i had any other illness I would have to wait for it to go, i would not be able to ‘think’ my way out of it. Sometimes it just helps to come here and get it out in the open and listen to others who are getting through too. So whoever you are reading this, have faith this site and Paul’s advice work better than ANYTHING I have come across and I have tried most things. Have faith and when you have not got your own faith come here for someone else’s .
    Thanks to Paul and the blog for all the help over 2011, and here’s to continued improvement for all of us and good support to newcomers for 2012.

  34. Sinead Says:

    hey- had written a big long post but typical me seems to have messed up in posting it…:)
    to cut the loooong post short-im doing much much better these days.my focus is still on me and how im feeling most of the time-but MOST of the time im ok with that-its really strange-i never thought i could accept it but i have :)im enjoying and looking forward to things again.most days i wake up and forget about anxiety for about 5 minutes until my mind chatter reminds me-but i laugh at that now!its still annoying that i cant just fully get on with my day but it is funny that my mind wants to remind me of a completely pointless thought “you have anxiety” but itll soon tire of it i know it will so i just let it be there and get on with my day.the only thing im fully anxious about these days is starting my new job ( a normal worry in my eyes) and the thought of meeting someone new and starting a relationship (completely absolutely terrifies me) but im not going to let anxiety prevent either from happening.
    happy new year
    thanks for everyones support over the times ive been on here
    ps sophia-you say when you meet someone you have to focus on saying hello etc-i experienced something like this at my worst.i found it got so much worse when i stayed away and was alone although thats what i most wanted to do because what was the point when i couldnt hear anybody but my own thoughts,i used sit in a dark room because i couldnt concentrate to watch tv and i was focusing so hard on me i forgot to turn on the light!dont be alone!try and be around people and just let yourself mind chatter-i know that being around people youre “meant to” concentrate on them and start a conversation etc but if youre mind is too busy then let it be just sit there quietly while getting used to life continuing busily around you.i know its hard because then you think people will think im weird/rude for being so quiet or not saying hello/starting a conversation.what i did was tell my family about it- and they just said right even if you cant concentrate on what we’re saying it doesnt matter.that took the pressure off, so i used to sit at the dinner table and my mind would be all over the place, their conversation a distant blur.and then over the days i would tune in a bit more and a bit more to their conversations until one day i was having normal conversation again- the mind chatter was still there-but nowhere near as loud and i was having a conversation because it came naturally not because i wanted to/or was trying to. hope this makes sense.all the best.

  35. JAN TURNER Says:

    Hi just want to say counselling has its uses, but doesnt really helpyou to cope with the anxiety as such. Just had a really tough time, as someone said, if you have no faith then I will have to get someone elses. My mind is shattered and feel emotionally spent. Heres hoping the new year may be better for us all.
    Jan

  36. Steven Says:

    Jan

    Try not to ‘try’ too hard.

    It is so so so much easier said than done, but I know for a fact that I have had a better Xmas this year than last…

    Last Xmas eve I cried when I got home from work as I did not feel happy. Last Xmas I felt empty!

    This year I was happy and enjoying myself. I did have moments on myself, but these were a lot lot less than last year.

    Be patient and it will come.

    Happy New Year x

  37. ginger797 Says:

    hi everyone, i was wondering if anyone feels that diet and vitamins play a big part in helping manage anxiety? as whn i was trying to fix myself mind and body after the dr told me its “just” anxiety and theres nthing you can do you will always be like this..i didnt want to accept that as i know my own body and at the time i had my first panic attack last year i wast eating hardly anything as ive had lapband surgery andcould only eat 1/2 a cup of food at any one time and i only ever ate things like biscuits yogurt ice creams, soup mini pies and loads of coffee and chocolate i never took a vitamin because id have to crush them and then put them into yoghurts so i just didnt have any…i was eating this way for 2yrs so in a average day i would have 3coffee’s for breakfast then a cup of soup satchet then id be dizzy all day id have maybe a couple of biscuists some pieces of chocolate of a mini pie from the shop and then 1/2 a cup of what ever i made the kids for tea like spaghetti. i would also have another 4 or so coffee’sin the day to give me a boost of energy ,.this went on for 2years and some days i wouldnt even eat that much,then i had a couple of small stressers happen in th space of a few months and then i gave my dog away on the morning of giving the dog away i had what i now know is a panic attack,i couldnt work out what it was and was scared to death s stressed day in and day out abot this feeling worrying heaps not eating the dr told me its just anxiety that he can put me on drugs for it but i didnt want that! any way i woke up a few days after the dr told me that and i could hardly sit up i couldnt think at all i was like i wasnt tere i was so dehydrated and dizzy anxious shaking sitting on a chair that day i tryed t fix myself whith geting my lapband loosened half way and eating regularly taking a malti vitamin and vitaminb complex fish oil daily and drinking liters of h2o daily so for a couple of weeks that helpe me soooo much i had no anxiety at all because d been reading pauls site about anxiety aswell but i still fely dizzy and craving sugar bu when id have suger id be on a high then moody so what i wanted to ask is maybe do you thing my problem was could actuallyhave hypoglycemia and that had triggered that panic/anxiety attack in me???? i also noticed that in the last 2 and a half weeks ive had no vitamns again and back to eating hardly anything or all the wrong foods and i have those btterfly feelins in tummy again and felt anxious again…so does anyone feel tht food and vitamins play a huge part of anxiety??? or maybe i just don have anxiety i miht just have hypoglycemia??/ please help???

  38. Matt Says:

    ginger….first of all, the fact that the dr. said that you will be like this the rest of your life is a load of bull. I am seriously surprised how they can keep their practice misinforming patient’s like that. I had panic attacks for a year, everyday, and if it wasn’t a fullblown attack, I felt the panicky feelings most of the day. The fact is, when I started researching and reading paul’s book, I recovered completely from panic attacks for over a year, until some really bad circumstances happened in my life that would make most people depressed and feel anxious. They came back and went away again. Read paul’s book and claire week’s book “help for your nerves” is what it’s called I think. You will start to recover through understanding it first, then you can apply the knowledge you’ve learned and you will recover completely, i’ve seen it happen too many times to know that it is possible. I wouldn’t recommend taking drugs, I did and it made it worse. But that is just my experience, it doesn’t mean the same thing will happen to you. Anyways, hang in there, it will get better.

  39. Matt Says:

    Also, wanted to add, some people will say eating right and vitamins help a lot, and some people will say that it won’t. vitamins helped me a bit, but they won’t cure anything. The actually cure comes from within, when you truly understand and apply the knowledge. Panic attacks aren’t fun and neither is feeling anxious, but when you learn to just practice some patience and really apply what paul says in the book and on the website, you will begin to recover. It won’t happen overnight or in a week, but over time it gets better and you move through it until it’s gone and you forget it’s even there. I am still in the process of recovery myself, but it does get easier over time, and that is the biggest healer for our worn out minds, time. And go tell your dr. that he’s full of it for telling you that you will have this rest of your life. Normal anxiety will never go away because that’s just a part of everyone, but the panic attacks and anxious feelings that seem to come and go, or just stay, will subside over time.

  40. jo Says:

    Hi everyone, happy new year. I’m sat here at 5.45 am shaking and stomach churning. I did start to feel a bit better over xmas, after starting with anxiety/panic attacks again in November, due to insomnia. I have been off work as I tried to go in during november, (as I knew I had to do normal things) and had a massive meltdown and been off ever since. I was very poorly and unable to eat properly, but my parents came to stay as i was afraid to be alone. It helped having them there so much, even though I hated them seeing me like that and worrying them to death. My Dad has just recovered from cancer and I feel terrible as I started smoking again too. I gradually started eating agian and started to feel a bit more peaceful and was sleeping better. I am still on diazepam for sleeping. I was starting to feel better and although still a bit anxious, I could still mostly get on with my day and felt more positive that I was going in the right direction. I was so pleased with my progress and After staying with them, (they live 150 miles away) i returned home. My husband is very supportive , but works long hours, so that has been difficult. It has been so good to have him home over xmas, but the last few days I have been getting so worried about him going back to work and me also having to go back to work. I feel utterley terrified about going back to work, but at the same time don’t want to be home alone all day. The anxiety has come back on again very strong and I feel back to square one. I have read Pauls book and it’s fantastic, but the panic and anxiety is so strong I can’t function at all for the past couple of days. I am so dissapointed as my appetite has gone and I haven’t hardly slept, even with diazepam. I am so scared, I feel like I want my parents to look after me again, but can’t bear to worry and hurt them all over again. I keep feeling so desperate, but I can’t and won’t end my life, my mum did that, I couldn’t do that to the ones I love. I just want this pain to stop, but I know that goes against Pauls advice. I am praying for help. So sorry to put such a negative post on, but I need to let it out somewhere.

  41. DCYL Says:

    The clock strikes 12 AM here in my part of the world. Happy New Year to everyone and around the world. Best wishes to all of you in the new year. Thanks to all of you for the help on this blog and continued improvement for all of us. See you all soon.

  42. Sally Says:

    Hi Jan
    I just wanted you to know that I totaly agree with you about counselling,for some people it works better than for others.Personally for me it doesn’t and I have had my fair share of it over the years.I think that a lot of anxiety sufferers are led to believe that it is going to be the magic cure which when it doesn’t make it all go away they are left feeling frustrated and hopeless as to where to go next.Pauls way is the only thing that has given me any periods of calm I am far from free of anxiety had it all my life,but even some calm time helps.Wishing you and all on here including myself a very peaceful 2012.Kind regards Sally X

  43. Bill first post Says:

    Happy new year to everyone.Just read Pauls book over the holidays,i am 56 and been suffering with anxiety for nearly a year now.One of my biggest problems was and still is accepting my symptons are down to anxiety and not any major medical issues,i have had the usual tests and they are all okay.My main symptoms are dizzyness/light headedness when i sometimes feel i am rocking and my legs get very tense,also split second feelings of passing out or heart feels as if it has missed a beat,these i find are very scary and hard to erase from the mind.ARE THESE NORMAL FEELINGS with anxiety.I guess i just need reassuring.Thanks for the book Paul,i will do my utmost to follow its every step.Best Wishes.

  44. ross Says:

    just dont know where 2 go anymore? why do i feel like this!! i let anxiety be for ages , really have . am i depressed? i just dont know what 2 do :( 2years + feel like im on the wrong path . hard 2 explain

  45. mm16 Says:

    ross i could of written your post, this is me exactly

  46. Debbie Says:

    Hi ya, happy new year to everyone, hopefully ur not thinking here we go again another year of anxiety and depression, is it possible that one day i wont be thinking that on january 1st i wonder? Pauls book has helped me so much and when things r tough out it comes and i desperately read through it again which gives me a lift. Ive been having CBT, i find changing the way i think so hard, at 50 i suppose having thought the same way for so long its going to b hard i just dont seem to b getting any better. Its so good to read other peoples symptoms and realise im not alone, the constant scanning your self and mind chatter it drives me mad, does anyone else think “how can what i think make me feel so ill” i just find the physical symptoms so hard, my insides feel as though i have stuck my finger in a plug socket, a heavy head, jelly legs and worst of all blurred vision which makes me dizzy and sicky, how can all this be because of a thought? Does anyone else find they feel better evenings? My CBT lady says the thoughts come first which causes the physical bit but i wake up in the morn get straight up for the loo have the jelly legs which then makes me think oh here we go! is anyone else like that? i dont lay in bed and think how do i feel? i havent thought anything, this is where i get confused over the whole thing, can anybody help ?

  47. Rich Says:

    Hello, I have been struggling with anxiety/OCD exactly three years to the day and am currently going through my worst phase, the Christmas period has been hell, obsessions about harming myself/others have been off the scale! I DO NOT want harm to come to anyone myself included! I believe in life and want my life back! Three years have took its toll I’m mentally exhausted, highly anxious, jobless, depressed and afraid of everything!

    Any advice would be appreciated, hope everyone is well and had a good Christmas and New Year

  48. ginger797 Says:

    thanks matt for your advice….i was also wondering if pauls book has helped many people as i havent brought it yet i have just read his web page and this blog..as when i wanted to heal myself and not listen to the dr about drugs i stumbled accross pauls site and was highly amazed as it sounded like i had written it myself and for the firsttime in a few months it seemed like someone understood gave me courage and strength aswell so is pauls book more in deth then the web site????as i might purchase it soon..i see a therapist but that doesnt help because she tells me its because of my childhood and the fact that my dad has anxiet and claustraphobia thati have anxiety..se also tells me to just keep asing myself” what am i telling myself” when i get a bit anxious about needing to go flee the scene so to speak….do you tink i should eep asking myself” what am i telling myself” because it seems to make the feeling more intence and i really dont know what im tryingto tell myself?????sometimes i have afeeling or maybe its a thorght of like someone or somethings “going or gone” its like im scared of that feeling of “gone or going i wont have anything” so how do i overcome this? do i keep saying those words over and over to desenceatize myself????

  49. JAN TURNER Says:

    Thank you Steven, yes I have been trying too hard. Have had bad time with a relationship breakup which has made things worse.I am on medication as i think theres no heroism in trying to be strong and not take anything, its up to the individual. What the doctor was saying I think is that if you have a predisposition to anxiety it may flare up under stress, but can be managed, and thats where Pauls advice comes in.
    Sally, happy new year to you.! I am glad you agree about counselling, it is not a magic wand! Hoping for a more peaceful and calm time.
    Regards Jan.

  50. JAN TURNER Says:

    Rich, you only think the things that are the furthest away from how you really are, which is a nice caring sensitive person ill bet!!! If you were a bit thick skinned you wouldnt be having these thoughts or thinking or dismissing them. They are frightening as you feel you might act on them, but there is no chance of that happening. If you were calm and thought that you would shrug it off. The thoughts are bringing fear, remember its just a though and its harmless, why dont you deliberately sit down and think right now I am going to think that thought, come on them where are you!!! I bet you cant.See how its tricked you!
    Jan.

  51. Rich Says:

    Thanks Jan your right about everything! I take medication too there’s no shame up to the individual! Such a strange illness as you feel your locked in a ‘mental prison’ and no one can see it or understand unless they’ve been there!

  52. JAN TURNER Says:

    Hi Rich, yes mental prison is right, we wish to God our mind wasnt on ourselves all the time but its only because of fear that it is. If we werent so afraid all the time the mind would look to other things. I truly understand what you are dealing with. It helps a bit to know you re not alone with it, and somewhere out there somebody is experiencing the same. Funny really as I look at other people when I am out and they all look perfectly normal to me, which gets me thinking I am alone in this prison. does anyone else feel this as well?

  53. Matt Says:

    hi…regarding the medicine thing, I took benzo’s daily for a few months when I was at my worst with DP, it did help, but i didn’t want to get addicted to them and physically my body was becoming more and more reliant on them. So I quit them and actually felt better without them. Some people take meds and it helps, just don’t make it a crutch. The meds helped me to work with myself, instead of using them as a cure all. Nothing wrong with taking them, just make sure you are working on yourself throughout while on them.

    Regarding on how I am doing, still up and down, the symptoms I still have are self-awareness most of the time and trouble thinking clearly. Since paul’s information sinked in with me, I don’t get scared or have a whole lot of anxiety. I’m still staying on the right path of moving on with my life and having hope, but sometimes it can be difficult. Oh, and I cut down on the alcohol a lot. A few months ago I was drinking almost every night, now I drink maybe once a week. I have felt better since. Anyways, hope everyone is doing good!

  54. DEBBIE Says:

    Happy new year to all! I just wanted to say how good it is to beable to read other peoples difficulties i dont feel so alone. I wouldnt believe anxiety can cause you to feel so ill, ive suffered for 30 years on and off, i had the worst spell 4 years ago then good up until 5 months ago and its been gradually getting worse, so im struggling at the moment, Pauls book gives me a lift it come out when i need some inspiration and usually works which gives me some relief for a bit. I find the physical symptoms so hard to cope with, blurred vision, jelly legs, insides feel like ive put my finger in a plug socket and dizziness, so its all quite frightening and is hard to think “its just anxiety”. I get weary with the whole struggling through the day just to go to bed then face it all again the next day, theres no enjoyment anymore, how can there be when feel so bad, well i think i need to get Pauls book out once again!

  55. Rich Says:

    Jan I dothe exact same thing, I look at people and I feel real jealous when I see them laughing or enjoying something yet they could be worse than us you never know! Im grateful for the things I have got, everyday I struggle to some extent but mindfulness helps me appreciate things.

    Matt I’ve read a lot of your posts over the past few months and found them very inspiring and am glad to hear you are doing well uve certainly helped others on here.

    Hope everyone is coping and getting by…..Rich

  56. Paul David (Admin) Says:

    New post tomorrow 3rd now, been very busy today, promise it will be done tomorrow

    Paul

  57. Patty Says:

    Hi all. I have a quick question……I have been suffering from some pretty intense anxiety for about 4 months now. I have read Paul’s book, and I think it will help me. I know that when these feelings of anxiousness come I am supposed to just let them come, but what do I tell myself at the time? Usually I tell myself something like ” I know you are there but I will not pay attention”. Is this ok or what else should I say? Thank you.

  58. lorryt Says:

    hi all
    happy new year to everyone. heres hoping that things for all of us improve. lately i am experiencing symptoms that i have never had before. And i suppose through my analytical state of mind i am wondering what it is that is causing it. My head is totally full up with chatter and feels like it being on fire and in pain. And i have got into the bad habit of not sleeping properly which i guess in turn takes its toll. It feels like ihavent had to reassure and kick myself up the butt for along time,. any advice?..

  59. Hannah W Says:

    I am 38 tomorrow and have suffered since I was 23 – 15 years of all this rhubarb, not surprising I’m so tired! 2012 is the year I recover.

  60. Jayneymy Says:

    Hi bill, I too struggle to believe that some of the physical symptoms are just down to anxiety alone, but I think this is all part if the anxiety cycle! I’m sure if I stop worrying about the physical symptoms they will subside, I suffer from palpitations too sometimes and my doctor said it is caused by anxiety, hope this reassures you a bit.

  61. Hannah W Says:

    Patty I was wondering the same thing – I say something like – ok you are just a feeling, my anxiety feeling and you will pass and then just get on with what ever I am doing – I hope it gets eaiser with time… I too would appreciate any other phrases that can help let them come and go

  62. DEBBIE Says:

    Today someone told me it helps to make friends with your anxiety…..some friend!! Even talk out loud to it like in the morning when your feeling awful say “morning friend (suppose you could make up a name) i see your going to be around today, sorry ive got things to do but your welcome to hang around but i wont beable to take much notice of you” You never know it might help, anything is worth a go!

  63. jo Says:

    Hi everyone, I just wanted to leave a more positive message, after the pretty awful one I left on New years day. At the time I didn’t think it would be possible to feel ok again, but I have started feeling better for the last couple of days. I just want to re-inforce ( to myself incuded) that no matter how deep in dispair we feel at times, there is always some peace around the corner. I have just started yoga and meditation classes, they are a godsend. Even when the anxiety is there churning away, the deep breathing and gentle movements help it fade away and the anxiety replaced by a sense of peace, calm and well being. I can’t recommend it ENOUGH! Its a bumpy ride, but i am starting to feel that Paul is right, we ALL can recover. Love and light xxx

  64. Carlie Says:

    Hey everybody, still having a rough time. It’s just hard to believe the DP will ever go away and I’ll feel more “connected” to myself again and things will stop feeling weird. I just keep having these thoughts that maybe I’ve had this several times throughout my life without knowing what it was, and this time it was really triggered and now I’m stuck with it. I know that’s a stupid thing to think, but those are the kinds of thoughts that pop into my head. I also get upset easily like tonight when my dad was talking about me getting out and doing things. Which I KNOW I need to do, but I guess I just wish he had talked to me a little differently about it. I know he’s just trying to help, but it wasn’t really a good night for that. Sometimes I just feel like my life has fallen apart so fast and I don’t know how I got here. I try to just do what Paul says, but at the same time, I’m scared to because I’m afraid it just won’t go away. Sorry to be negative, I’m just not having a good year so far. :( And it’s hard to even explain how I’m feeling because my mind is such a mess and I’m sure I left out some things I wanted to say.

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