I’ve had a really bad time with Anxiety recently. It got to the stage where I felt I was going to have to go to hospital. I just couldn’t control my mind. I didn’t understand what was happening and it was very scary. I ended up going to the doctors. I got very lucky in being pointed towards an online CBT (Cognitive based therapy) course. My doctor then told me one of the most important things I’ve learned. We have ups and downs on the way to recovery, progress isn’t in a straight line. The advice on this site not to get hung up about bad days is so helpful.

Today was a great example. Being late is “My thing”. I cant stand it. My schedule was going to bits this morning and it was doing my head in. My anxiety was taking over. I just decided to go with it. I told my wife what was happening. She was getting agitated because I was being a Jerk because of my worry. I decided to go with it. I’d been pretty good recently and a bad day wouldn’t be the end of the world. Had a think about my anxiety and if it was really warranted. As usual it wasn’t. That was one of the CBT tools I’ve learnt. Because I was just going with it, the worry eased and I ended up having a great day. I think the beauty of this is you dont compound a problem. Just going along for the ride stops the snow ball effect with my thoughts. I wish I knew this stuff years ago.

If you fell better now than you have in the past then thats a great thing. Don’t minimise how good that is. I’m still not feeling like “Me” but I’m getting there. Keep going it will be worth it.

cheers
Damian

thanks for getting back to me. lots of what you say makes sense to me so i will take it with me thanks again take care

Lindsey x

I became a shell for atleast a month or so, my Uni work was suffering, i could hardly make it into Uni, i became scared of sitting in lectures incase a Panic Attack happened. I went to the doctors and they put me on Beta Blockers, i was to take these 3 times a day but i was’nt too happy about taking them. So before any stressful or anxious situation i would take them, and they would work, they would subside my physical symptoms but i would still have the anxious thoughts from time to time, everyday was spent wondering why i felt like i did, i thought i was going mad, i had racing thoughts of suicide because i could’nt cope with feeling like this and failing Uni at the same time, i didn’t want to let anyone down, this just made me feel worse.

Then i stumbled onto your page, i read through the whole website, even the blog posts, and it had felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders, these blogs and your understanding of the subject really hit home with me, everything that you’ve covered i related to and now understand why i feel like i do sometimes. Ofcourse i have my up and down days, but instead of dwelling on them i simply stop and think “ok its natural to feel like this, your only human, ofcourse your going to have not so good days” i let them in and i just accept them, sometimes its not easy and i do get a flash of that horrible feeling i constantly had but this is happening less and less now.

I am recovering slowly and hopefully this will be a thing of the past when i hopefully Graduate, i just want to thankyou so much you have given me hope! I have even stopped taking the Beta Blockers most days when i THOUGHT i needed them, i still have them in my bag as a comfort, but I CAN get myself through situations i find difficult.

Lets just hope i can keep this up, as i only have 2 months left of Uni!!

If we were in our calm flow anyway – I call this our ‘natural subconscious momentary state’, then we wouldn’t have to ‘change’ anything, as this is our optimum/self-confident ‘unknowing’ state. cheers Will

Look at it this way – basically, due to our character make-up – we run a very ‘fine’ line between being productive and destructive. I wont go into too much detail here, but I know this includes ’so’ many people when you see all those destrucitive addictions that ’stem’ from anxiety.

It is our ‘intensity’ that causes anxiety – as when things get messy/stressful/pressured or worrying etc – we ‘easily’ BOIL OVER into a ’secondary’ rising in our intensity.

What I found was that ‘to flow’, we have to be calm – and then we simply ‘glide smoothly’ through all the thoughts/feelings we have – these include good thoughts and bad thoughts/feelings, like being stressed. However, because of our ‘tenndency’ to ‘react’ to our good and bad flow (to hold on too much to the good (control) and to really hate the bad) – we ‘jump out’ of our flow via this intensing process.

By calming/deflating our mind (sorry, no internal speaking here like ”calm down, calm down” – as that just intenses our minds further re still overdoing) – we rsume our calm flow and ‘no matter’ how many times – even every second – that we are tempted to tense up/panic, we just need top persevere with this calming – as time goes by, clarity and a calmer persona WILL prevail.

These days, I am ’so’ much calmer as a person and ‘disciplined’ re not getting too intense as I know where it will take me. However, the problem with us all, is that we ‘don’t’ persevere with calming as we ‘feel’ we should panic/keep doing/intensing – even though this is inadvertent.

I really take my time with as much as I can to stay on a calmer level – and if things get stressful and I feel a little panicky -

have you too suffered with anxiety?

lindsey x