Comments on: Don’t try to please people around you http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/ Anxiety no more Helping sufferers overcome anxiety and panic issues Sat, 04 Feb 2012 22:30:41 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Ang http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-15761 Ang Thu, 30 Jun 2011 11:15:37 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-15761 I can really connect with this post. As i am new to this an i am trying to find out all about anxiety this web site is fantastic!! Getting back to the post i am constantly trying to please people, i'm afraid to have an opinion on anything because those around me think i am going off on one! They tell me to wise up and catch a grip, and don't speak to me at all,ifind this even more stressing. Those closet to me keep telling me that if i don't get a grip i will lose them all, how do you overcome this?? I can really connect with this post. As i am new to this an i am trying to find out all about anxiety this web site is fantastic!! Getting back to the post i am constantly trying to please people, i’m afraid to have an opinion on anything because those around me think i am going off on one! They tell me to wise up and catch a grip, and don’t speak to me at all,ifind this even more stressing. Those closet to me keep telling me that if i don’t get a grip i will lose them all, how do you overcome this??

]]> By: Helz Belz http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-2672 Helz Belz Sun, 23 Nov 2008 14:32:05 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-2672 Hi Candie thanks you for the reply. Ive been doing the trying to accept thing for about 5 weeks now, and i think there has been some improvement. I've always been more anxious than other people, and this all really got very bad about 2 years ago (a long story...essentially I got very worked up and anxious about things that I hadn't really given much thought to before, only to be told that what i had thought all along was 'lies'...this left me with a sort of fear or lying to myself or others and a feeling of pointlessness. i got over it for a while but has come back again recently). I don't want to be stuck like this, and sometimes i feel the 'spark' in me that says 'yes, there is a reason, lets do this!' but when that 'spark' has gone its very lonely and scarey. There are good times though, when i feel up i feel much better, maybe i am just noticing the down, depressed times more as they contrast so much with the up times. but thats analysing it all again, oops! But when my mind automatically thinks 'why are you doing that? whats the point in that?' I dont like it. but am trying to think that these thoughts won't have any place in me when I feel better so why get worked up about them now. I will take a look at the newer posts. Sorry, I seem to have written a short life story here! thank you again, this place is truly a god-send for so many people. h -x- Hi Candie
thanks you for the reply. Ive been doing the trying to accept thing for about 5 weeks now, and i think there has been some improvement. I’ve always been more anxious than other people, and this all really got very bad about 2 years ago (a long story…essentially I got very worked up and anxious about things that I hadn’t really given much thought to before, only to be told that what i had thought all along was ‘lies’…this left me with a sort of fear or lying to myself or others and a feeling of pointlessness. i got over it for a while but has come back again recently). I don’t want to be stuck like this, and sometimes i feel the ’spark’ in me that says ‘yes, there is a reason, lets do this!’ but when that ’spark’ has gone its very lonely and scarey.
There are good times though, when i feel up i feel much better, maybe i am just noticing the down, depressed times more as they contrast so much with the up times. but thats analysing it all again, oops! But when my mind automatically thinks ‘why are you doing that? whats the point in that?’ I dont like it. but am trying to think that these thoughts won’t have any place in me when I feel better so why get worked up about them now.
I will take a look at the newer posts. Sorry, I seem to have written a short life story here! thank you again, this place is truly a god-send for so many people. h -x-

]]> By: Candie http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-2664 Candie Sat, 22 Nov 2008 21:27:42 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-2664 Hi Helz Belz dont try to work this out- if you look on the more recent posts you will see Scarlett suffered both and fully recovered. I dont think any of these illnesses are for life, both can be cured by accepting how you feel. Depression is also a symptom of anxiety. Really bad anxiety is fear, really bad depression is feeling really low. Now i used to have a mixture of both- but when i accepted my anxiety the depression went as i wasnt depressed because i have anxiety if that makes sense. Your best posting in the most recent posts for advice etc... as general conversation on a daily basis is usually posted in them. You do get the odd person still posting in older posts but not on a regular basis. Pop along and you will see plenty of people feel the same as you and plenty of people have come through too. See you there! Hi Helz Belz

dont try to work this out- if you look on the more recent posts you will see Scarlett suffered both and fully recovered. I dont think any of these illnesses are for life, both can be cured by accepting how you feel. Depression is also a symptom of anxiety. Really bad anxiety is fear, really bad depression is feeling really low. Now i used to have a mixture of both- but when i accepted my anxiety the depression went as i wasnt depressed because i have anxiety if that makes sense.

Your best posting in the most recent posts for advice etc… as general conversation on a daily basis is usually posted in them. You do get the odd person still posting in older posts but not on a regular basis. Pop along and you will see plenty of people feel the same as you and plenty of people have come through too. See you there!

]]> By: Helz Belz http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-2661 Helz Belz Sat, 22 Nov 2008 19:54:03 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-2661 Just a quick question, dont know if anyone can answer it at all, but is there any way of telling the difference between really bad anxiety and depression? because I keep having a thought at the back of my mind that says that all this advice is good, but won't help if this is proper depression that needs meds, if that makes sense? the thought that it could be much worse is very scarey. thanks, h -x- Just a quick question, dont know if anyone can answer it at all, but is there any way of telling the difference between really bad anxiety and depression? because I keep having a thought at the back of my mind that says that all this advice is good, but won’t help if this is proper depression that needs meds, if that makes sense? the thought that it could be much worse is very scarey. thanks, h -x-

]]> By: Helz Belz http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-2616 Helz Belz Thu, 20 Nov 2008 15:14:24 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-2616 wow, another thread that i can totally relate to. i've noticed recently that I have a depressive bout nearly everyday at about 4pm, and am starting to wonder if they are caused by the worrying during the day. I have recently chnged living conditions (back at the family home, unemployed etc) and i am always so irritable, but i hate being irritbale with my family so i try and cover it up by seeming to be cheerful. but it just makes me feel worse and makes me feel so exhausted. I know that this thread says to stop pretending and just be me, but i dont like to be so irritable. should i just tell everyone 'i am likely to be irritable, but dont take it personally?'. how i feel and react to people is getting me down and anxious so much :( h wow, another thread that i can totally relate to. i’ve noticed recently that I have a depressive bout nearly everyday at about 4pm, and am starting to wonder if they are caused by the worrying during the day. I have recently chnged living conditions (back at the family home, unemployed etc) and i am always so irritable, but i hate being irritbale with my family so i try and cover it up by seeming to be cheerful. but it just makes me feel worse and makes me feel so exhausted. I know that this thread says to stop pretending and just be me, but i dont like to be so irritable. should i just tell everyone ‘i am likely to be irritable, but dont take it personally?’. how i feel and react to people is getting me down and anxious so much :( h

]]> By: Matthew http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-2119 Matthew Sat, 11 Oct 2008 05:27:47 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-2119 As anxiety sufferers we tend to not want to offend people and want people to like us. I still am a little like this. At times I find myself caring too much about what people think about me. It's usually when I'm feeling a little anxious or low that this happens. When confidence returns however, we care much less of what people think of us. I'm at a stage now where I voice my opinions (in a diplomatic fashion) in many different life situations. One of the mistakes I did make during my early stages of recovery was that I felt I should wait til I felt good about myself until I would speak out. Now I'll talk to anyone even if I feel anxious. I do sometimes get some strange looks at me, but my "whatever or so be it " attitude reassures me that I'm always moving forward, and that it's just all part of the journey to recovery. A classic example: I may chat to an attractive looking female / female that I am attracted to and find myself getting somewhat anxious during the course of conversation. I used to beat myself up about it afterwards. The thing is most guys (without anxiety) get nervous when around attracitve females or girls that they are attracted to. Often I think we are way too hard on ourselves. Learning not to please people around me was initially hard but became easier as the anxious thoughts became less and less and I saw myself becoming increasingly confident. I'm still yet to fully recover, but can't help feel so grateful for life. As anxiety sufferers we tend to not want to offend people and want people to like us. I still am a little like this. At times I find myself caring too much about what people think about me. It’s usually when I’m feeling a little anxious or low that this happens. When confidence returns however, we care much less of what people think of us. I’m at a stage now where I voice my opinions (in a diplomatic fashion) in many different life situations. One of the mistakes I did make during my early stages of recovery was that I felt I should wait til I felt good about myself until I would speak out. Now I’ll talk to anyone even if I feel anxious. I do sometimes get some strange looks at me, but my “whatever or so be it ” attitude reassures me that I’m always moving forward, and that it’s just all part of the journey to recovery. A classic example: I may chat to an attractive looking female / female that I am attracted to and find myself getting somewhat anxious during the course of conversation. I used to beat myself up about it afterwards. The thing is most guys (without anxiety) get nervous when around attracitve females or girls that they are attracted to. Often I think we are way too hard on ourselves. Learning not to please people around me was initially hard but became easier as the anxious thoughts became less and less and I saw myself becoming increasingly confident. I’m still yet to fully recover, but can’t help feel so grateful for life.

]]> By: lorryt http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-1893 lorryt Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:22:54 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-1893 have had a good cry , still feel crap, and rubbish and low, but am trying to get on with things easier said than done really!, but i will get there cheers guys i am on medication for depression but i think its a low so that wont affect too much i hope have had a good cry , still feel crap, and rubbish and low, but am trying to get on with things easier said than done really!, but i will get there cheers guys i am on medication for depression but i think its a low so that wont affect too much i hope

]]> By: Candie http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-1892 Candie Wed, 10 Sep 2008 12:48:45 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-1892 Hi Lorryt I understand how hormones can affect.. yes! My worst two episodes of anxiety came after having hormone medication! So if you are on anything that pumps them in your body get it checked out.. as i felt much better after coming of them. Implanon and pill.. etc! Dont under estimate how they can effect your body.. i know one woman who lost 60% of her hair and got depression... and iv herd thousands of stories of people saying they gained anxiety, depression etc. Personally, i feel anxiety came way before i took any hormones.. but they deffinately tipped me over the edge! Bet all the guys are confuzzled now haha! Well i started my psychology course yesterday.... im not sure if i'm going to carry on with it to be honest. We have to follow one scientific book- and we are not allowed to use experience, beleif etc- just scientific proof to do our exam! No wonder psychologists are so far from the truth at times- how can they possibly understand when they are taught everything is black and white- chemical imbalances etc! It really annoyed me, things will never change in the mental health field until they open there eyes and listen to us- the real proof that not everything is to do with tablets, chemical imbalances etc. Hi Lorryt

I understand how hormones can affect.. yes! My worst two episodes of anxiety came after having hormone medication! So if you are on anything that pumps them in your body get it checked out.. as i felt much better after coming of them. Implanon and pill.. etc! Dont under estimate how they can effect your body.. i know one woman who lost 60% of her hair and got depression… and iv herd thousands of stories of people saying they gained anxiety, depression etc. Personally, i feel anxiety came way before i took any hormones.. but they deffinately tipped me over the edge!

Bet all the guys are confuzzled now haha!

Well i started my psychology course yesterday…. im not sure if i’m going to carry on with it to be honest. We have to follow one scientific book- and we are not allowed to use experience, beleif etc- just scientific proof to do our exam! No wonder psychologists are so far from the truth at times- how can they possibly understand when they are taught everything is black and white- chemical imbalances etc! It really annoyed me, things will never change in the mental health field until they open there eyes and listen to us- the real proof that not everything is to do with tablets, chemical imbalances etc.

]]> By: lorryt http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-1891 lorryt Wed, 10 Sep 2008 08:26:37 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-1891 hi all great to see everyone helping each other, i am struggling a lot today, probably because i had a mega busy weekend sorting out decorating putting furnioture in , a birthday party and a night out. i am knackered and my daughter started school today i am a bit upset and had a few tears, but the thing that still gets to me is the disturbing thoughts. i am getting all the physical stuff back , but i can handle that alot better, but the thought of me being left on my own, how am i gonna cope. it doesnt help that im tired, as someone else commented its always worse for me then too. i have another funeral to go to next week , which i am unsuire how i will cope with, but im not too stressed about that , as i have to deal with today. one day at a time, thought i could start looking forwarda bit more , but when i struggle i have to put the reins on and slow down. i love my life and my kids but when things hit me i seem to let them hit me hard. maybe i am just too sensitive. i dunno. Candie, lisa ,katie and katy , you all understand the woman thing and hormones! im sure that contributes too. i know i am recovering, and am not despairing as i was before, but i forgot how hard it hits, when after a few good weeks , you feel like the best you have felt for so long. well am off to watch tv for a bit and relax as i can have the remote to myself for once ! have a good day all hi all
great to see everyone helping each other, i am struggling a lot today, probably because i had a mega busy weekend sorting out decorating putting furnioture in , a birthday party and a night out. i am knackered and my daughter started school today i am a bit upset and had a few tears, but the thing that still gets to me is the disturbing thoughts. i am getting all the physical stuff back , but i can handle that alot better, but the thought of me being left on my own, how am i gonna cope. it doesnt help that im tired, as someone else commented its always worse for me then too.
i have another funeral to go to next week , which i am unsuire how i will cope with, but im not too stressed about that , as i have to deal with today. one day at a time, thought i could start looking forwarda bit more , but when i struggle i have to put the reins on and slow down. i love my life and my kids but when things hit me i seem to let them hit me hard. maybe i am just too sensitive. i dunno. Candie, lisa ,katie and katy , you all understand the woman thing and hormones! im sure that contributes too.
i know i am recovering, and am not despairing as i was before, but i forgot how hard it hits, when after a few good weeks , you feel like the best you have felt for so long.
well am off to watch tv for a bit and relax as i can have the remote to myself for once ! have a good day all

]]> By: brian http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/2008/08/25/42/#comment-1890 brian Tue, 09 Sep 2008 05:42:57 +0000 http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/?p=42#comment-1890 hey everyone, well i guess ive got a little to complain about to dean. i have been letting my anxiety be for the last couple of weeks but it doesnt seem like its getting any better. im having symptoms ive never really had before and my anxiety just seems higher than its ever been. i know this definitely might be connected to the fact that im in college and just started classes again, but i wonder if although i am letting my feelings be there, i am still dwelling on them / obsessing over them. for me it seems that when i relax and give space to my thoughts and feelings they become the center of my attention, and im not sure if this is right. should i just let them be the center of attention or do i need to change my approach at all? By the way Candie it really sounds like your doing great and that is awesome. it is certainly inspiring to watch someone on the right road to recovery. hey everyone,

well i guess ive got a little to complain about to dean. i have been letting my anxiety be for the last couple of weeks but it doesnt seem like its getting any better. im having symptoms ive never really had before and my anxiety just seems higher than its ever been. i know this definitely might be connected to the fact that im in college and just started classes again, but i wonder if although i am letting my feelings be there, i am still dwelling on them / obsessing over them. for me it seems that when i relax and give space to my thoughts and feelings they become the center of my attention, and im not sure if this is right. should i just let them be the center of attention or do i need to change my approach at all?
By the way Candie it really sounds like your doing great and that is awesome. it is certainly inspiring to watch someone on the right road to recovery.

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