Will my anxiety ever go away?

This title I have used is because it is one of the questions that people search more for on google than anything else. The trouble is that people will try anything to make it all go away and this in many cases is the problem. Their desperation to be better in many cases makes them worse. I know this is what happened to me. I don’t think a day went by where I did not worry about how I felt, a day never went by without me trying to figure a way out of this hell, a day never went by where I did not try to do something about it. I searched through the yellow pages for something to make it all go away, I tried acupuncture, hypnosis and many other useless treatments that just parted me with my money. My whole week was set around making it all go away, everyday was a battle.

My day would go something like this…..I would wake and feel awful, very anxious and almost like like a walking shell. I also felt odd and strange, not with it, but I had to earn a living so off I went to work in auto pilot. I would get to work and try and hide from everyone how I was feeling, put on an act and hope to hold it all together. I would then be in my own little world for a few hours trying to figure out how to make it all go away. I would worry and obsess daily about how I felt. Then I would go home after an awful day of worry and self pity. Then I would search for the miracle cure to make it all go away, maybe a trip to the library to read my 30th book on the subject, I had to get rid of this thing. At this point I had been given little explanation if any as to what was wrong with me, so I had to try and figure it all out myself. This went on for many years and I was getting worse…Why?

Well a lot of people develop anxiety through a build up of stress. Well I felt worse because I spent all my day worrying and stressing about how I felt, the last thing my body needed, it wanted a break. My mind was so, so tired from all the deep thinking, trying to figure it all out. Did I give it a break? Did I hell, I constanatly tried to figure a way out, again worried and obsessed about it, so my mind tired further and I felt more lost than ever. I felt so dis-connected from the world because I had not allowed myself to connect with it, the subject of anxiety and how to find a way out had consumed me, is it any wonder I was getting worse?

Sometimes even after advising people they can carry on in this pattern. Never quite sure that its not something else and they need to keep searching, worrying and trying to do something about it. In my book I said it is like having a broken leg and hitting it each day, it will never repair, it needs to be left alone and given a little time. They day I gave up the daily battle with myself, the day things got easier. I was not cured by any means, this took more time. To integrate back into the world you need to begin to live in it again, no matter how you feel. Don’t waste time trying to rid yourself of how you feel, this is how anxiety re-invents itself. You are trying to change something that is normal in the circumstances.

I wont claim things are easy, they were not for me at first, the real rewards come later. But this is another mistake people make, they become impatient or let one bad day throw them back into despair. So off they go on their roundabout of searching for something to make it all go away again. There is nothing wrong with educating yourself on the subject if the information is useful. I instantly knew when I read something if it was good information, it made sense, it felt right. All the miracle cures and therapists I had seen before did not, I knew deep down the answer must be out there.

I hope there is something there for people to relate to.

For more help and advice visit my main site www.anxietynomore.co.uk

Paul

For more information about my book β€˜At last a life’ visit

www.anxietynomore.co.uk/the_book.html

77 Responses to “Will my anxiety ever go away?”

  1. samantha Says:

    this i me at the moment i am constanly inward thinking any tips on how to stop this habit. also paul i get weird thoughts and strange images that pop up in my head this really worries me is this still anxiety?

    i just feel weird at the moment not surprising really if all i can think about is myself

    samantha

  2. Claire Says:

    Hi again,

    I just wanted to add a little comment to say that I’m pretty sure I’m finally on the recovery road. Last week I was on a course through work where I had to be far away from home and I made it through the 5 days and it was like a little mini victory for me! Ever since then for some reason it has been easier to accept that all this worry and upset has been anxiety. I don’t know why but I just didn’t quite believe it before. I always thought that it was all me and there was something wrong with my head, now I understand that its not me and it hasn’t been me for 2 months. But thanks to this website I’m understanding more and I’m seeing shots of the real me more and more every day. Even if its only for a few seconds. Its like rays of light through a cloud. And believe me thats progress from being a person who didn’t have a positive thought in their head.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’m not 100% yet but I’m okay with that now. I still get frustrated and irritated with the feelings every now and then but its just wasted energy. Paul, you are right it is hard to recover and I know I will have bad days too but I’m not going to worry about it. I’ve also not needed to use the website as much as I used to and I see that as a big achievement too.

    I just wanted to say thank you to everyone and also to say don’t give up. We’re all in it together.

  3. Anthony Says:

    Ah, this morning, as with the past few mornings, I woke up with the adrenaline, worry, and heart racing. I just told myself that it needs to do what it needs to do. In a few mins, it calmed down, and I fell back asleep.

    Last night I got out of the house and went to my buddy’s house to watch wrestling. I’d say 50% of the time I thought about anxiety. It’s so hard to be patient, but that’s what I need.

  4. Tarmo Says:

    Paul, I thought I had heard everything from you already but the way you described your typical day of anxiety really resonated with my own life. I mean, I lived exactly like that for a long time too. And when I read your text I realised how much I have improved already. It’s all about not running away from your own life, no matter how weird you feel. I’d like to say all the people who read that text and feel like Paul wrote right now: you can get better as well, no doubt about it.

    Good job, thanks again!

  5. Debbie Says:

    yeah tarmo you’re so right. when i read pauls blog i realised i’ve come so far! Its just about enjoying your life no matter how wierd you feel….

  6. No More Anxiety Says:

    Yes Tarmo I lived like that for 10 years and I still would be now if I had built my knowledge up. A lot of people don’t realise how far they have come until they remember what they used to be like. I want people to progress at their own pace as this is how it works. Like it or not reintegrating back into normal feelings takes time and they maybe a few setbacks along the way. Your so right about not running away from your own life and how you feel, you have to swim against the tide sometimes, but I knew to feel normal again I had to just live my life normal, NO MATTER HOW I felt. No more worrying, no more fighting, no more obsessing. Of course my old habit of doing all this dragged me back from time to time, but onwards and onwards, all symptoms were just feelings after all and also a few silly thoughts thrown in, was it really that bad that it should dominate my whole day. All this is made far easier though if we understand why we feel like we do and that is what I tried to really get across in my book. It is al lot easier to not worry, obsess and fight when we understand what is happening and why. Knowledge is always power.

    I found this once and kept it, it is not my words but it really struck home to me.

    Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
    Watch your words, for they become actions.
    Watch your actions, for they become habits.
    Watch your habits, for they become character.
    Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.

    It is not telling you to do anything, more how each stage can develop. I see a lot of what happened to me in those words above. This is why I took all thoughts with a pinch of salt in the end, I broke the cycle. I went against my instincts and refused to fall into habits, i.e avoidence etc…These habits then did not build my character and my new outlook became my destiny.

    Paul

  7. Anthony Says:

    Paul, you have said that you’ll never have anxiety again. How do you know this? Have you made a lot of lifestyle changes to prevent it? Do you still get massage therapy and exercise and eat better?

    In the past when I’ve overcome anxiety, I have said that the medication is working, but I think my body just naturally got better. So once I felt better, I thought, “Okay, that’s over.” I really didn’t make many lifestyle changes. I think the only thing I ever did was not drink caffeine. How do you handle stressful situations?

    I know you aren’t supposed to “do anything” during recovery, but once I get there, what can I do to stop these anxiety episodes in the future? Cause I am going to have stressful situations, like my wedding, a career, children, etc.

  8. JoeyLowtown Says:

    Paul, thanks again for your great advice. I always THINK im accepting, but then I fall back into obsessing and watching myself closely all day long etc. Not really accepting at all. I have made some progress, like I really dont fear depersonalisation, so therefore never really suffer it. I constantly fear losing control and just giving in, or fear that I will have 50 more years of this and never be able to travel etc, have kids etc. My days are filled with these thoughts and then I end up fearing that I’ll fall into deeper depression and harm myself. Which I desperately dont want to do! I also sometimes desperately try to figure our what life is all about and constantly fear death. I dont want to live forever or anything. I just dont want to die at a young age. I want to get married and have a family. Be a NORMAL person. When my days are filled with sadness and fear it seems so far away. Interestingly, I get on with my day, I dont let it stop me doing much. I just obsess about these existential, violent and scary thoughts day in day out.

  9. No More Anxiety Says:

    Hi Joey, I understand your post above and have a little advice. What I think you maybe doing is trying to stop yourself obsessing about these thoughts or at least trying to control them, as these seem the real problem with you. The best thing to do is let yourself obsess about these thoughts, this way you are not trying to DO something about it, I mean if your mind wants to go there, let it, this way you are not fighting, I hope that makes sense. I still feel you are having a battle with yourself. You say you constantly fear losing control, and just giving in, this is what you want to do, just give in, don’t have a daily battle with yourself.

  10. JoeyLowtown Says:

    Paul, you’re right. I still have this daily battle. I still desperately look forward to things, so its like I almost fear having depression, rather than actually having it as such. Thanks again Paul. Even though I stll suffer at times, when I look at where I was, with no understanding of the subject six months ago. Your advice has done a lot!

  11. Amy Says:

    Joey, I can completely empathise with everything you’re saying. That’s how I felt over Christmas. I can tell you, standing in the queue at TKMaxx having an existential crisis is not a good experience! πŸ˜‰ But, to give you a bit of hope, I am feeling masses better now. Yeah, I still get the odd day when the thoughts and negativity creep back in, but I am trying to get on with things and not obsess about that. It’s a case of baby steps everyday, and occasionally you take a step back (maybe just half a step). Progress can feel frustratingly slow, but it’s still progress, and you’ll get there. :)

    I actually talked about all this with a friend last night – she’s perfectly ‘normal’ (whatever that is!) and she still spends a lot of time thinking about ‘who am I?,’ ‘why am I here?,’ ‘what’s the point?.’ And then a psychologist friend chipped in and assured us that’s normal and everyone has those thoughts from time to time, it’s the human condition. Except maybe complete bimbos and dullards – but who would want to be completely brainless and superficial?!! πŸ˜‰

  12. Amy Says:

    Oh, and Joey, your comment about fearing depression really rang bells with me. Something I find really useful is to divert my thoughts from all the ‘what ifs’ to ‘how do I feel right now?’. And usually my mood is pretty okay: sometimes I feel quite content. And that offers a lot of reassurance. You can’t possibly know what’s going to happen in the future, so why let it ruin your ‘now’? I think most of us (not just the anxious sorts!) spend most of our time thinking ‘I’ll start living when…’. It sounds really simplistic, but if this last year has taught me anything, it’s that this is my life, so I might as well enjoy it! In fact, I have a right (maybe even a duty) to enjoy it. I know, that’s easier said than done, but I think its a crucial mindset to have in order to start to recover. I would even go as far as saying that 2007 (my annus horribilus (sp?)) has taught me how to appreciate life. Turning all the crap on its head, I am starting to be able to put a positive spin on the anxiety and negativity, i.e. it made it necessary for me to take positive action to deal with the anxiety and worry that had dogged my life for years. While I felt I accepted it as a part of me in the past, it was from negative perspective. Now, I am accepting it without allowing it to limit me (does that make sense??!). And best still, I can see a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel! It’s been a long, hard slog – very challenging at times – and there’s still a few hurdles to jump, but can now envisage a life, not free, necessarily, of anxiety (because anxiety serves a purpose to a certain extent), but a life not limited by anxiety. And it feels great!

    (Apologies for rambling – but I’m getting quite evangelical about Paul’s method!)

  13. Leanne Says:

    I always check in with this blog and find it ever so helpful. Its particularly comforting to read comments from other anxiety sufferers. Waking up with my heart racing is common for me. I have started to be able to make it go though unlike the “good old days” when it felt never ending. Everything has come such a long way from how I felt even one month ago. I travelled to Bournemouth on the train the other day and could feel my breathing start to go funny (like I have to remember to breathe and i can’t catch my breath) and I thought oh no! And then I thought oh well who cares? Even though I have an irrational fear of death, I find that when I start getting scared from my symptoms, dizzy weirdness tingly hands, heart racing breathing weird, I just think oh well this is the way it is. My worst fear with the dying is I don’t want my family and friends to be sad, I’m actually not scared of it myself. Crazy. Like I Say, much much better now thanks to Paul’s ongoing help. THANK YOU.

  14. Anthony Says:

    It’s so weird, I could be obsessing over my anxiety all day, but then at times at night I feel great and tell myself “what am i worrying about?” It doesn’t happen every night, but it has happened.

  15. Amy Says:

    That’s not as weird as it might sound Anthony. My days are always worse. I generally feel fine in the evening, even if I’ve spent all day as wobbly as a jelly! I guess it has something to do with hormones or something scientific like that.

  16. No More Anxiety Says:

    Hey some really good advice above, Amy I love your posts and positive attitude and John is new to the site and the blog but is already picking a lot of things I want to get across.

    Also can I just say hello to Leanne, someone I have been in touch with in the past couple of months, nice to see you pop in and say hello Leanne, great attitude on the train and I am so glad you are seeing improvements.

    Lastly I have received two emails in the last week from people I strated helping last year. They had all the concerns on listed on here the same concerns everyone else seems to have, will I ever get better etc…I just want to post both emails in full in my next post to let people know that with patience and knowledge you will improve, these people say they cannot and did not believe how far they have come. I remember both and trust me they were in a real hole. The best emails of thanks I receive all come a while after they first landed on my site and I think posting these would give so much more hope and belief to people who still struggle on here with certain things and show that it you need to go for progress and not hope to sort everything out overnight.

    Paul

  17. samantha Says:

    paul

    i wondered if you could give me some feedback on my message above reading others has helped a bit but i still feel fear of my symproms which makes it worse that nobody else has realted to therm

    thanks samantha x

  18. Edward Says:

    Does anybody else seem to have “triggers” that spark anxiety. If so what are they ?

    Samantha – I too have constant odd, scary thoughts which appear totally by their own accord. I know this is not me but this seems to feed my anxiety further.

    Don’t think your alone in this. Everyones anxiety seems to be different but it’s all anxiety at the end of the day.

    Paul any tips ?

  19. Debbie Says:

    Paul it would be really really good to read peoples storys of improvement.. Just might give us all a boost!!
    hope everyone is doin ok!

  20. No More Anxiety Says:

    Samantha, I don’t know which post you mean, I get about 20 messages a day on here and I will miss a few, that is why I like people to answer each other. If not it would be far too much for me. I do though try to answer when I feel I need to or I want to expand on something. I really can’t let it turn into a question and answer blog as honestly I would again start to get swamped.

    I am busy today but as you have asked I will find your post and see if I can help. But again don’t be offended if I don’t answer, it just gets a bit too much as I spend a lot of my time on my main site, I just want this to be a community for people with me popping in now and again.

    Paul

    Debbie I will post both emails on Monday for you, I also think they will help.

    Regards Paul

  21. Manuella Says:

    Hello Paul, everyone!

    Just wanted to say that since the day I found this blog and the main site, my days are much, much better and clear. Yes, it’s hard sometimes and it takes time, but understanding and being kind to myself and my thoughts are making a big change.
    Of course I feel anxious and tired, but I’ve learned here to give myself a break and also, learned to compliment my good, joyful moments. It may sound simple, but it’s quite hard for me not to be scared of happiness sometimes…lol..I’m a being clear? I mean: I may be having a laugh with friends, feeling brilliant and then: BAM! (why are you being so happy?)… you know what I do? I think: well, everything WAS cool a minute ago, may be a bit less now…but will be fine again, later…whenever!

    (gosh, hard to express those feelings, specially in english)

    Paul, did I thank you yet? (I know I did..hehehe)…thank you for you help, patience, time and kindness.

    People, hope you all have a good day :)

  22. Amy Says:

    Manuella – I completely ‘get’ what you are saying. It’s almost as if there’s a little voice in there saying that ‘there’s no point being happy cos you’ll soon be back to being miserable, oh, and for that matter, why do you think you have a right to be happy?’! Oh, low self-esteem – I think most of us anxious-sorts suffer. At times like that I (try) to remind myself that I am *great*! I’m strong, especially so cos I cope with all this anxiety crap on a daily basis AND manage to succeed in life. It doesn’t always help, obviously, because my anxious-self is pretty low-beat and cynical. But I do find it helps to act happy. Be how you want to be and you’ll eventually train your mood to follow.

    I was thinking Paul, an emergency cribsheet might be really helpful. You know, something to carry in your bag for moments when you need a little reassurance/calming. Though, obviously I appreciate you’re very busy. Perhaps it’s something we could all contribute to? Like, things (activities, visualisations, distractions…whatever) we find helpful.

  23. Amy Says:

    Edward, I certainly have triggers. I think I’ve already explained in a comment to an earlier post, that my most recent bout of anxiety was triggered by the suicide of one of my housemates. So, any mention of suicide usually sets off a nasty reaction in my head. I try to filter the things I watch/read (not an avoidance tactic as such, just trying to be kind to myself!), but sometimes the odd random reference slips through. For example, on Tuesday I got ‘hit’ by five (yes, FIVE!) different references…and one of them was in a book written by the Dalai Lama! πŸ˜‰ You just have to grit your teeth and ride out those situations I’m afraid. Cos the only other option would be to completely withdraw from ‘normal’ society – and that ain’t healthy.

  24. Claire Says:

    Hi Samantha,

    I juat thought I’d say that I completely understand how you feel. I spent ages looking for answers specific to how I felt and when I didn’t see anything about my particular obsessive thoughts I’d automatically thing it wasn’t anxiety and assume that my thoughts were really me. I can promise you that everyone understands how you feel, I know I do. I’ve had bouts of anxiety for 16 years and I can safely say no experience of it has been the same. Thats why each time I go through it I find it hard to believe that its anxiety each time. But i is and we will all get better.

    I hope thats made you feel a little better. take care. xx

  25. samantha Says:

    hi claire,

    thanks for your post and yes i do feel a bit better

    paul its ok i know you are busy and doing a great job , i am from yorkshire too

    samantha

  26. Edward Says:

    Amy, Claire – You would not believe how much that has helped me. I could not understand why certain things trigger this and that’s why I could not fully accept it was anxiety but it’s clear that it is.
    And yes I kept (keep) looking for answers on my paticular thoughts but everyones are different.
    I am struggling but I can begin to feel things very gradually improving.

    Thanks – This blog is such a good vent!

  27. Marina Says:

    Hi everyone,

    This blog is such a relief to me. I’m having a particularly anxious day but reading fellow sufferers comments has helped. I’m just going to let it be because I know it will pass.

    I’ve suffered from anxiety for years, although I’ve only known it was anxiety fairly recently. I always believed that my negative thoughts were because I was a negative/sensitive person.

    I started having scary thoughts of death since the age of fourteen which always lead to an anxiety attack. I didn’t tell anyone at the time not even my parents, mainly because I didn’t want them to worry. I kept it hidden for years. Suffering in silence. I thought I was the only person in the World who thought this way. It was a very lonely place to be.

    I actually went to see a Counsellor recently who told me it must have been something that happened when I was a child. I now know it’s just anxiety and they’re only thoughts. I don’t get these thoughts very often now and I’m not as frightened of them which is probably why they’re so rare. I wish I had known about anxiety all those years ago. But never mind I know now.

    Since reading this blog I’ve also learnt to just “go with” my thoughts of “what if’s” “why’s” and “maybe if I’d done this”. They’re only thoughts. I’ve also learnt that for years anxiety has stopped me doing things simply because I didn’t think I could do them. Like driving a car for instance. I didn’t think I was good enough. Not now though. I bought myself a car recently and I drive to my heart’s content, whether I feel anxious or not.

    I have some way to go before I can say I’m free from anxiety but I can definitely see a light at the end of the tunnel. I’m actually feeling happy for once in my life. Content with who I am. I am so grateful to this Website and Paul’s book.

    All the best

    Marina

  28. Manuella Says:

    Hi Amy!

    Er…sorry to be a pain but: cribsheet? Like an amulet?

    brgrds πŸ˜‰

  29. Amy Says:

    Hi Manuella – sorry! A cribsheet is usually something (on paper) you might prepare before an exam, or if you’re learning a new skill, etc., i.e. a list of reminders, main points etc.

  30. Edward Says:

    Hi all, Just wanted to say that I went out last night with some friends for a meal. Although my anxiety was constantly in my sub-conscious I had a really good time.
    I can totally relate to comments such as – when you are enjoying yourself and then “wham” something says “stop enjoying yourself you have anxiety” I get this a lot, it always seems to drag me back down.

    I also agree that my anxiety seems worse in the mornings and seems to get better throughout the day. I read somewhere that this is down to our bodies running slower when we first awake and our minds are therefore less reciliant?

    Does anybody else think this?

  31. JoeyLowtown Says:

    mine’s the worst when I get in from work.Work keeps me occupied and afterwards I have too much time to concentrate on it!

  32. Rick Says:

    hi paul, everyone
    Reading through the comments above, i find it very comforting that ”im not the only one” i would say that im well on my way to recovery and life doesn’t seem to be such a demand anymore. I dont want to seem patroising, but everyone who is finding it hard to cope or just going through one of the ”setbacks” you will find the right path it just takes time. In my case it took 9months of stress to build up through various things that happend in my life. Then one day the bubble burst and the anxiety came flooding back, far worse than id ever experienced. So looking back now i dont epect to be better overnight, if it took 9months to get ill then i least expect it to take 9months for me to get better or maybe longer so that im not putting a time limit on recovery. Even now some of the sensations linger but they are just thoughts or sensations nothing that can hurt me. Ultimatley i feel a million times better and i feel stronger for it. For those who are struddling keep strong keep thinking positively.
    Rick

  33. Shirley D. Says:

    I find my life is very strange at the moment. I can feel (thankfully) that my body is righting itself, but the symptoms diminishing have left me feeling almost as isolated.It’s almost like having the caste off and having to learn to walk again.
    Inwardly I still feel strange, but I know that I am improving nicely. Having been out of work for six months (because I couldn’t cope) I have started applying for jobs, different conflicting advice, start part-time and look for full time later, now I just want to be employed by someone! to get some order of semblence back to my life. The sleep deprivation which once worried me the worst has become less significant, I just hope that once I start a job my whole normal routine will return to it’s natural balance.
    My worst time is the morning, but that’s just laying in bed, once I’m up and about my mind gets distracted even if it’s looking through the window at passing traffic.To get out into the fresh air is the best, more distraction. I have recently taken on a few voluntary hours at a local charity shop and realised on my first day that the old Shirley was still there, could still communicate with the general public.I walked back with my head held high instead of the stooped person i had become.
    I still get ‘what if’s’ and all those other leading questions that could turn the situation right back around, but I feel stronger mentally to turn those leading questions away – long may it continue.

  34. Leanne Says:

    I have triggers also. Particularly bad news on telly. However, sometimes I can make myself panic. Like last friday I was in the pub (sober) and I saw a massive flash of light (which was only a camera) but seemed extra bright.

    It stunned me so much I forgot what I was going to say to my friend and totally panicked thinking my brain had stopped working. It was an awful feeling. A rush of nausea washed over me, followed by I couldn’t breathe. The word I was looking for was bananas and when I finally remembered it I shouted it. She noticed but no one else did. After which my arms were all tingly and weird as usual but I just talked my way out of it and later on explained what had happened. I’m lucky to have such good pals.

    I wanted the night to be a good one, and it was.

  35. Edward Says:

    Hi everyone – I seem to still want to gain as much info as I can about this. It seems to help ?

    I read that OCD is a form of anxiety ? i.e. obsessive thoughts and thought patterns and things anxoius people do to negate these thoughts and feelings. I recodnised some of the symptoms, does anyones else think they are connected / similar ?

    Or am I just worrying again ?

    Just can’t seem to get over that final hurdle to the road of recovery! Perhaps im trying to hard ?

  36. steph Says:

    hi paul & everyone, im new to this site and i have suffered with anxiety for nearly 5 years now all though its been on and off. I was fine (apart from the odd anxiety attack after a night out,i used rec drugs in past) up untill begining of this year where i have experienced sleepless nights constant mind chatter anxiety dp and now some depression. Its really getting me down i have been trying to accept but im obviously not doing it right, when i feel down or anxious i think im going to have this huge breakdown and end up mad! there are times when i can tell myself and talk myself out of it, has any one got any advice, and how do i really know if im letting the thoughts be? thanks

  37. Angie Says:

    Hi,

    I have noticed that when I have some moments, hours or days of not dwelling on or fighting the anxiety I tend to feel a bit shaky…could this be excess adrenaline floating around? what is a good way to relieve it…or do I just wait it out and see where it goes?

    Thanks!

  38. trey Says:

    hi every one i jus wanted to say that i was doing well for a while but the last few days my anxiety and dp have been so bad i felt like i was acutally already crazy and my mind is just now realizing it! very scary thought! i just couldnt let it go so i went to a thearpist and she said it just sounds like acute anxiety and depression! i now have to go to the psychatrist something i dreaded having to say im doing! has anyone felt that some how there different and they dont just have anxiety that it cant be that simple as to why they feel so weird! i cant shut my thoughts off and its tiring me out i feel im losing the sanity “battle”! it acutally hurts me to feel this stressed! heeelp?

  39. candie Says:

    Trey, i think we have all thought it at one point or another. You just have anxiety, people who go crazy are not aware of it! Infact the awareness created from watching yourself, other thinking etc really is the oposite of going crazy!!

    This thought is caused by your mind scrambling for clarity, something to pin this awful feeling too.. anxiety playing its tricks yet again eh!

  40. Bradley Says:

    Ok I went to the doctor and they said that I have anxiety. I have a phobia of passing out for some reason i don’t know why. So everyday I worry so much about it and freaki out about it and it starts to make me feel all funny like labored breathing and thinking i’n going to pass out. And when I don’t think about it I feel perfectly fine. But I can’t make the thoughts go away forever. I will not think about it for like two days and I will feel awesome, then the next day I will wake up and then i start to worry and thats when I start feeling all weird. If someone could talk to me or give me some suggestion i would greatly appreciate it. You could also E-mail me at wpd2231@yahoo.com. Thank you so Much.

  41. Alexis Says:

    Hello! I have been battling with anxiety for the past 2 months. It started 2 summers ago all of a sudden when I lost about 10 punds because of it and lost sleep. Then I recovered because I started going to the gym and got a second job. During my first year of university I felt very happy and sure that it was over for good. But I guess that it was just the newness of experience. Now I finished my second year and I feel the same anxiety again, although it has been so for about 2 months now. I am very afraid that it will ruin my health, because I constantly have sleepless nights and nausea, making myself eat so that I don’t lose weight. I feel restless and panicky when I am by myself at home and I get afraid thinking that my whole life might be like this…In addition to actually feeling anxiety, I worry about having another panic attack and getting severely ill. I also worry about the burden this feeling puts on my family. Sometimes, however, this feeling disappears by itself, for example, when I hang out with friends or when I talk to my family. However, I am in constant fear of it returning and it does most of the time. Embarassingly enough, I have talked to some doctors about it and no psychiatrists, they all said it was emotional. What would you recommend me to do? I am really against taking medication, because I hope that I can find a way out of this on my own. Do I have to make lifestyle changes or will it stop naturally with time? Thank you very much for your help. I am just worried this feeling will never go away..

  42. No More Anxiety Says:

    Alexia, just look how many times you have said ‘I worry about………’ you are giving anxiety all the fuel it needs, the first thing to do is live in the present and don’t worry about the future, that in itself will bring some peace, don’t feel the need to have a mental battle with yourself everyday, this is just counter productive as its all doom and gloom. You are letting your mind control you with all the worry of the future instead of the other way around. Try and just live with today and don’t go down the ‘What if route’ this is very important.

    Paul

  43. Alexis Says:

    Dear Paul, thank you very much for this advice. My family and friends all say the same thing to me as well. I just have to learn how to do it, I guess..

  44. SJ Says:

    Alexis,
    I have suffered with Anxiety for nearly 4 months now. It started in early May. I have chosen not to take medication as i believe the side effects would add worry to worry so one problem is enough to deal with. I am muddling along and some days are easier than others. I have been through most of the stages and for the last 2 weeks have felt ok in the morning when i first wake up only to then start to feel odd and lost. My motabolism is up and down and i have lost some weight which is normal. I can see where you worry about that but i eat and drink little and often on the days i don’t have an appetite rather than force feed myself. It is very soul destroying as you lose part of who you are which i feel is the worst part of it all as life changes dramatically and things you took for granted seem like such an effort now. I find talking to family and friends helps a lot. I also listen to a relaxation CD which does the trick and i try and take a hot bath before bedtime or have a massage from my husband which helps me sleep through til the morning. Most of the symptoms have subsided and i still have mind chatter but not as bad. I just struggle with the lack of motivation and feeling unlike the me that i know. I guess time is the factor as we all know but i think for everyone it is a frightening experience no matter how they feel, think or where they are at the moment. I feel that i am recovering slowly and taking each day as it comes good or bad which is the key to moving forward but it isn’t easy and hormones can play a role too. I don’t think there is anyone out there who doesn’t wonder at some point whether it will ever go away cos there is no time limit. I can truly relate to your post one way or another.
    Good luck with the battle. xx

  45. Emma Says:

    I have been really suffering with anxiety since April 08. Looking back I can see that I am improving – each week seems to bring different symptoms – and a lot of them I now dont get. However every single morning I wake with a pounding heart, and feel really ‘strange’. It gradually goes away within an hour. I would love to be able to wake up and feel like I used to pre April. I dont take medication but I am thinking about it. I dont care anymore about the side effects, cos as far as I am concerned there are side effects to anxiety, like future health problems, such as blood pressure and heart disease, which has been proven. The most puzzling thing is I have nothing at all to be anxious about and never have – nothing major anyway, like some people have. I dont sit and worry about anything but I get all the anxiety symptoms. Has anyone else ever experienced this, where they dont have anything to be anxious about yet get they symptoms? I would appreciate any help that can be offered. Hugs Emma xx

  46. Liann Says:

    I have read all the posts on this blog and its very interesting. I have some questions for you all. I did read that some of you arent taking medication but what about the rest of you. Are you taking medication and still having bouts of anxiety? Does your anxiety come and go or is it there all the time.

    My anxiety came about 8 years ago. I believe it came due to the dealings of my father suffering with a brain tumor. I dealt with feelings and emotions for about a month not knowing what in the world was wrong with me. Finally someone said maybe it was anxiety and I did get on Paxil and within days the cloud was lifted and i was back to the normal me again. Life went on as normal until about 7 years later and I dealt with a very stressful sitauation and I could tell the anxiety was trying to creep back in, it last a few days and then I was back to normal again. Now 6 months later I am dealing with another stressful time and I am anxious again.

    So now this time I am wondering if maybe my medicine is loosing its effectiveness etc or is it normal even on medication to have episodes come and go and then be fine.

    Thanks for all of you that are posting on here

  47. Heather Says:

    I have had panic attacks / anxiety since my first panic attack 10 years ago. Ive been on all medications out there which helped but caused weight gain and other symptoms I have been off of medication for over a year now and lost all the weight from the medicine, and i was doing really well until a recent trip to a warehouse store that sales items in surplus and my husband and I were talking previously about the failing economy and well in the store I lost it, I started with all the panic symptoms and wanted to run out of the store, which I pretty much did and sat outside with myself wondering why this is coming back, I had been doing so well. Now I’m afraid again to go anywhere even if its not by myself , fear of feeling this way again fear of my breathing to stop or my heart to stop in front of a bunch of people, I afraid to drive on my own because what if I loose it and cause a accident because everyone ones when you are in middle of a panic attack you can’t think straight. I feel depressed because I don’t do things with my kids like other moms, I feel bad that I depend on my husband so much . I refuse to be on medication because it doesn’t really fix anything, i eat healthy and exercise 2 hours a day yet it’s still there. I’ve become fustrated with my life, 10 years of this has made me desperate for change…but how…? I want to change myself. I don’t like therapist because they tell you to pop a pill and make it better. I feel so alone .. when I go to a store nobody else seems to have to the struggle I do to be there. I am only 27 and want to be the independant women I know I can be…. Does anybody have advice?

  48. Mark Says:

    Hi All, I have suffered with anxiety and panic attacks for the last 18 years when I was cheated on by someone I really loved. I never got over this and over the years it has got worse and worse. I found it hard to trust anyone. This has caused major stress on other relationships and also caused me to feel lower and lower about myself. I felt unwanted, no good, rock bottom low and even taken a handful of pills at one time cause i saw no way out. I have always asked myself why and what i did wrong. Now I have panic attacks very badly. My heart starts thumping really fast and i describe it as a pain cause to me it is. I feel sick and get awful pains in my chest I cry all the time and no matter what reassurance I get it is never enough. My current partner has always been supportive but has also effected her because she feels she is being blamed for things she would never do and who could blame her for feeling like this??
    About 7 years ago i was diagnosed with depression and the series of medication started. Somemade me feel better but the side effects were unbaerable. My panic attacks got worse and i certainly did not get better.
    Then my current partner told me some hidden haunts that she had in her life and they hit me hard (I am talking about all sorts of abuse) totally horrifying. I felt I couldnt deal with it, the panic attacks started getting worse and I was not being supportive of my partner. I convinced her to go to a doctor and she was also diagnosed with depression and the tablets started (Citalopram) She was taking these for 2 years. She completly changed but not for the better ! She became enclosed and could not shed a tear. Yes her panic attacks slowed at first but where had my partner gone ? She started lying to me, we had massive arguements and she flung horrible abuse at me and it wasnt until she calmed down that she regretted what she had done. She pushed me away really without realising and i felt alone. So what did I do ? I made her feel bad about these situations and kepton about them to her, i thought this would stop her if she realised what she was doing. But No it got worse her panic attacks were uncontrollable and so were mine I kept threatening to leave and it made things worse. We were both in a hole we could never get out of and this amazing relationship we once had was in turmoil!!
    The reason I am telling you all this is because i all of sudden awoke and felt cured.
    Now be warned i have only made this turnaround over the last couple of days but I feel completly back to normal. So fingers crossed it will stay. The key is that i beleive it will ! This is the biggest medicine you can have beleif in yourself and to realise who you are.
    Following a dreadful row andmaking mypartner feel i was leaving she suddenly said she felt the same way and now doubted me.This hit me hard this person who always loved me suddenly says she doesnt want me! This is when i suddenly realised how selfish i really was. This is how I made her feel all the time and now i didnt like a taste of my own medicine.
    I nearly lost my job because i couldnt think of anything other than nmy depression and my partners change.
    So I threw all the tablets away and my partners and we both started a road to recovery. We have now both stopped the tablets for 2 weeks and there was improvements straight away. Some happiness came back, our sex lives improved, we were able to talk nicely just the way it always was but the panic attacks still came on strong.
    Then yesterday I woke and felt good ! First time in 18 years. But half an hour later the panic attack came and i hit rock bottom. about 2 hours through the attack I suddenly snapped and said to myself what am I doing?
    Then i started realising all my faults everything i had put my partner through, all the blame and the rows and making her feel guilty for her faults. I starting realising that i was never to blame for what happened 18 years ago and am looking for answers that are never there.
    Today I woke and already felt better. Beleive me going to bed and beleiving things will be better tomorow rather than worse really helps. I felt positive and then it suddenly hit me. Depression ?? Am I really depressed? and the answer is NO !! If you beleive you are depressed theni think you will be, if a doctor tells you you are depressed then you are branded with it. You need to beleive you are not depressed. It is only a word. You are special, you are a person, there is nothing to worry about. The world starts to seem different and your real life starts to return.
    I have never spoke about my problems, and now I found this site and started to write cause it felt right. I really beleive i am on a road to recovery and want to help others get to this stage.
    The medicines hide the problem but never solve it, they just create you into someone you are not. Beleive in yourself and stop and really think what am I doing? Realise your true faults and own up to them. I beleive this helps, once you realise them you can start to change them. This will hopefully make you feel positive, I beleive the biggest step to solving depression is to believe that you dont have it. Beleive that you have a problem that can be resolved. All the time you beleive the problem is not curable it wont be, beleive it is and it will be cured.
    I know this is early days but it is a huge step in the right direction I hope this helps in someway!

  49. Shoshana Says:

    Hi All,
    I am so glad i came across this board in my search for help.
    I am 56 years old female. Never been the calm type of person always needing to be busy. A few month ago, my husband lost his job and all of a sudden a felt that i cannot breath. I kept sighing, yawning trying to breath but the more i tried to more frantic i got.
    My doctor put me on xanax for help but now I am trying to help my self by telling myself that it is all in my head. My mornings are sometimes hard for me. I so much like the idea of not thinking so much about the anxiety, i just find it hard to implement it.
    Any suggestions?
    Shana

  50. Chris Says:

    Fellow anxiety sufferers, As I read your posts, I see all the fears you have had, I too have had, I have had anxiety since I was a teen ager, and probably before that, I was always scared of the dark, I slept with my older siblings, as a child I was scared of getting bad dieseases, had my first panic attack when I was 17. Had no Idea what was wrong with me, it was scarry as heck, Then as I got older my anxiety was all about losing control, or losing my mind. It isn’t like I am really scared of anything, it is I have these scarry thoughts, and I think Man that isn’t a normal thought, and then the I must be losing my mind kicks in, so I guess I am just afraid of the feelings, or I am afraid of the fear itself. I am my own worst enemy hehe. Anyway, I am now 42 years old, I have lived with this crap all my life basically, I am successful, and have 2 great children, and been married for 22 years,. My anxiety always told me I would never be able to get married, and would never have children, never thought I would live this long, or keep my sanity this long. However, I am still to this day un medicated, never got any meds, I have never told anyone other than my closest family that I even had anxiety, keep your heads up people, You will make it

  51. kim Says:

    Amy I am so glad I read your comments. I also went through the same thing as you and it really messed me up good. A good friend that I had just been with went home and committed suicide. My mind did not know how to understand what he did. I went from a completely normal person to a very sick person almost overnight. I am slowly getting better but i still look for answers on what really happened to me i know i have anxiety/ depression but i dont understand why it came on so quick. I have to also monitor what i watch and i cant stand anything that has to do with suicide. For a long time i obsessed why he did it and so on and i would sit there and shake and i couldnt eat more than a couple bites. I lost alot of weight. My biggest fear is what if I loose control and get like him. I would never hurt myself but is it normal for me to think and fear that i could become him and ever do what he did. I feel like my mind thinks things that i dont want it to. I cant understand why my mind thinks things that i hate. I know I have to realize that im not him and this is my minds way of copeing but how do you ever forgive yourself for getting that low and how do you believe once you get better that it dosent come back. If you or anyone has any feedback it would help so much thanks.

  52. Carmen Frangiosa Says:

    I think the hardest part of recovery is the patience thing, its like am I doing this right or not? And I am seeing days where I feel 75%, but I just can’t seem to get over that hurdle yet. And I do agree that I think alot of anxiety sufferers have the personality where you are trying to figure this thing out. Is it from the fact I am grieving over my mom’s death? Yet I had this minor version while she was sick, so I am not sure if it is all because of my mom or not? And all day I think about this, for 8 months now, even the pretty good days I don’t let myself go and say wow I am getting better, its like I am having a good day, but I still feel like tommorow will be another off-day? So Paul are you saying if I forget this, even the days I have my Generalized Anxiety and feelings of Derealiztion/Unreality, the faster I will recover? I feel like I am accepting it, but don’t know if I am doing it right? My girlfriend said after my so-called mental breakdown this past Dec 1, I am doing better than I ever was. Its just turned me into a quieter anxious person…The old me comes back sometimes, but when I was Old Carmen I had a way of life just flowing with it, charm everyone around, felt so connected to the universe and everyone around me. Life was heaven. Since my breakdown, I feel like I am slowly coming out of the firey pits of Generalized Anxiety and Depersonalization, its been a long year, but Paul does give me hope I will get better. I just have hope, but sometimes I think I give this feeling and thoughts control over my life. So that’s why I am not getting better as fast? Any comments I would love to hear? Thank you all for listening to my story

  53. chonie Says:

    I’m 28 and I have refused thus far to take anti-anxiety drugs, but for a few brief exceptions…In high school after being depressed most of my senior year, I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and they put me on Effexor. After 2 weeks I felt like I didn’t care about anything and a piece of my personality was gone! I hated it. I couldn’t “wait-and-see” what a build up of the drug would do to me, which was the doctor’s advice at the time.

    I have suffered with palpitations, numbness in my legs and feet/hands, breathlessness, etc. etc. But I have found that going to bed early, morning exercise and restricting my diet helps- I try to eat more omega 3 (lots of sardines) and less omega 6…I quit dairy and am doing gluten-free experiment that might not last, we’ll see. All of this is worth trying!

  54. Samantha L Says:

    Hello there everyone, Ive suffered from anxiey and panic attacks for a good 14 years. Constantly worring about my heart rate going up and what my body is always doing and not to mention negitive thoughts that would make me worry even more. I became scared to go anywhere and do anything. I stopped having a drink every now and again, coffee and tea. I stopped everything i enjoyed because i thought it would make me better. It just made things worse as i felt like i had no enjoyment anymore. Im on the road to recovery with the help of Zoloft and counciling. Anxiety is nervous energy, it will pass and it will not hurt you. Its what your body does to protect its self.Its your bodys way of telling you that something in your life doesnt fit with you anymore. In other words something in your life needs changing for the better. I still get anxiety but i know now its just a feeling just like being excited or sad as they too are feelings. TRUST that your body knows what its doing, BELIEVE in yourself and be your own best friend, Love who you as this is part of the human make up.

  55. Kenny Says:

    Hi this is me Kenny I’m actually suffering from anxiety as I speak why do I know is just anxiety? because I have big doubts of it that is really anxiety, I think to much always had I over think everything and feel like I can’t help it. So now I feel dizzy, worried all the time, I feel shaky most of the time I feel like I’m going to faint, I feel weak, I’m scared to workout because then I get even shakier, Every morning im worried about how my day will go when I wake up iv’e also feel body numbness sensation I’m always thinking that the symptoms I get are probably because there’s something wrong with my head and this is every day its like a very Dark scary world but what keeps me up is that iv’e been thru this before about 9 years ago and so far what I remember is that I was living a normal life after it. I guess now I’m just waiting for my self to get the point and for my body to start getting better.. If anybody has any advise or any type of help I would really appreciate it..

  56. Jeanine Says:

    Hi everyone I can relate to you all,my anxiety first started with a.side effect from a medication called reglan for my.acid reflux,I was only trying to get better for my stomach but instead I got anxiety. I’ve had this for seven months now and its been the worst seven months of my life, initially I was afraid of being alone, darkness and silence then like Kim and Amy it got much worse after seeing my sister in the hospital after an attempted suicide with the anxiety medication that was prescribed for me.I didn’t take it because I was afraid of medication but.my doctor convinced me that was the only.way,I gave it to my sister because she was a pharmacy tech to take care of it but instead she took it all because she suffers from depression. my frightening and horribly debilitating thoughts stemmed from there. I couldn’t get her image out of my head I would wake up in a panic because I feared I would go crazy and harm myself. it went away but then like a month later it returned with a.bang,somehow I started being afraid I would harm others now too. I’m afraid that the anxiety and horrendous thoughts will win and I’ll do those things .this last month it has gotten worse I’ve gotten every single crippling symptom of anxiety and then some,blurred vision, unbalanced /dizzy,racing non stopthoughts, racing heart, panic attacks in public places because I’m afraid I’ll cause a massacre.I was such a kind wonderful person and now IM crazy and don’t know how to reverse all this.I can’t even be near my loved ones because I’m afraid I’ll hurt them.I’m always getting the killing,harming,etc. thoughts about everyone and everything. I just wanna be a good person .I have not been able to put Paul’s method into action because I haven’t understood it well enough,when I’m getting horrifyingly awful thoughts I just can’t have that whatever.attitude,its tough and it seems so complicated. I aswell can’t watch or hear about.murders.or suicide because I think its me,for example the Colorado Guy that shot those people in the theatermade me so afraid because he looked normal before and went crazy!!I don’t want to be like that,I have killer thoughts 24/7 and I just don’t think its normal.I haven’t read the book yet as I’m having complications getting it but as soon as I can I will.I hope this is just anxiety, I can go on and on. one more thing I watched a Guy that had a phobia of noises and right after I got a panic.attack at a clinic,every sound seemed amplified,I got racing scary thoughts about everyone and couldnt breath, so frightening!!I’m a bit of a hypochondriac

  57. Jeanine Says:

    sorry for my babbling and grammar errors

  58. Stephen Shale Says:

    Hi Paul, and all. I discovered Paul’s book in January, but am quite new to the blogs, but am really finding everyone’s comments helpful. This topic seemed to be particularly relevant due to my stage of anxiety. I’ve made such huge progress since taking on board Paul’s advice, the knowledge of the subject, has taken away so much fear, so much so that I’ve had a 6 month spell of feeling the best I’ve ever felt.

    I feel that I’m definitely at the setback stage, I’m passed anxiety dogging me for continuously long periods, it’s gone as soon as my trigger has passed. I feel that I am now 90% recovered, I am so much more positive towards things, and worry a lot less, yet the anxiety is still there, and I definitely think “will it ever go away”. It’s that final hurdle.

    Although I fully understand what is happening now, and I fear it a lot less, it’s the unpredictable times that affect me more. The unpredictability of my body suddenly showing the symptoms, beyond logic it seems to be. I’m finding this final acceptance really quite hard, as my anxiety “episodes” can be quite spread out, so that makes me more frustrated than worry, that it keeps occuring.

    I’ve seen a quote on hear from Paul: if I had anxiety tomorrow it wouldnt bother me. For me though I see that as very frustrating, this isnt the recovery I want, I want it to end, no matter how well I can deal with it.

    Would be great to hear from any of you.

    Steve

  59. kelli Says:

    i am so very grateful to find this website. am having a very hard time with constant worry and trying to figure all my thoughts out. at one point i even thought i was going mad. I’m hopeing this blog will start again as im seeing the last comment was back in september.

  60. Jacqueline Ferguson Says:

    Hi, i’m 15 and have been dealing with anxiety for almost over year i have been seeing a therapist and i am currently on prozac (anxiety medication) i have been feeling pretty good on the meds and feeling a lot more myself but these last couple of weeks I’ve been heading down hill i feel like its not working anymore and i feel i can’t do anything about it. I Want this anxiety to be over i hate dealing with all these feelings and my head keeps spinning with all the things that i worry about in a constant basis. I feel like i either should go up on the dosage to my medication or switch. I don’t know. but its killing me and it feels like I’ve been hit by a bus mentally and physically. My parents said that the higher the dosage the bigger the problem and i hate hearing that because i don’t want to have a problem. Please help

  61. Jas Says:

    I have recently just been hit with what I think is anxiety, iv had a very stressful childhood for as far back as i can remember, I am 18 now and this stress at home has just suddenly stopped due to the fact that one of my parents have moved out and so the stressed levels have dropped to almost nothing, so I believe that maybe this sudden change that my body is not used too has caused anxiety as I’ve been told it is like a healing process where I have had a wall up in my head and been in fight mode all these years that now my walls are coming down and I’m trying to find my real self, does this sound right to you guys? I have the same symptoms, the worry…’what if it’ll never get better’ ‘I’m going crazy’ but I don’t seem to fear things like social things like some people I have read about, feels like it’s just a battle in my own head where I want to get better but find it hard to just ‘do nothing and let it ride it’s cause’ I also get a strong feel of anxiety where I just feel like an adrenaline through my body that will be on and off all day does anybody else get that? I seem to soon after have a feel of depression after these adrenaline rushes where I feel very low, which just isn’t me I need used to feel like this?! Things that remind me of my past do trigger off these feeling and I seem to spend my days just worrying which does make it worse guess I just need some Answeres and to hear that other people et these symptoms so I can just relax and not worry about ‘what if it’s something else’ I seem to get it through the day but at night I feel fine?

    Thanks guys, hope to hear from you soon

  62. Pamela Says:

    Hi Paul I have the same repetive mind chatter & scary thoughts everyday & feel like I’m never going to be free I over analyze everthing the past the future fear I’m going insane thinking everything before i do it.

  63. Meara Says:

    Hello everyone. I’m in the same boat as a lot of you. I’ve had bouts of anxiety all my life and was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder and OCD when I had my first all consuming meltdown seven years ago. I recovered, it took a while, but I kept busy and eventually recovered. I’d been doing pretty well until seven weeks ago. I had another flare up and it’s been horrible. I’m anxious all the time and mostly about being anxious. I’ve been in therapy and on medication, exercised, done CBT, read books and forums. All the information seeking mentioned above basically. At this point I’m so desperate, every second is a torment and I’ve got nothing left to loose, so I wanted to know how one submits to the fear. I feel like I’m submitting to it now feeling it all the time. None of my distraction techniques have worked and I spend most of my time sunk in it, feeling the symptoms. I’m trying to keep busy, but I’m very isolated where I’m living now and have no job ( I’m living at home after graduating from law school studying for the bar). I am looking into volunteering though. Any advice? I know I’ve come out of this before, but it feels like nothing’s changing. I’m so tired of the torment.

  64. Pamela Says:

    I’m at a stage of wondering why my mind thinks the way it does & wonder how much more I can put up with scared out my wits.my anxiety controls my thinking fear I’m due a breakdown so many thoughts,images wonder why I feel the way I do analyize everything.x

  65. Olivia Says:

    Hello everyone,
    I came across this blog, as i searched ‘will it go away’ searching for answers like probably most of you lot that have commented. Its so reasuring to know that it will heal in time, and just knowing that there is people like me out there.

    I’m 16, my borther passed away in a tragic acciedent in January 2013, thoughout all that year i had to deal with GCSE’s and also the passing of my brother i found it so difficult, but would block my emotions and just carry on with life. But recently this year i’ve find it so hard the grief has really hit me this year, as well stressing about the daily life troubles (e.g finding a job, getting money, interviews for jobs, exam results, college work etc..) along with the greif. One day i had a panic attack while in the bath, my heart racing, sweating, shaking, thinking depressing thoughts, finding it hard to brethe, diffuclt to sleep at night, horrible day dreams, thinking i was doing the same thing over and over and everyone was copying me but wasnt (if that makes sense) this scared me, really scared me! I didnt want to tell my mum incase i was turing mental or going to die, i kept it to myself for a week to see if it would go… I told my mum a week later as i had them everyday since my first one, she taken me straight to the doctor because she knew that i may have anxiety as she had recently devloped it too but had it since my brother passed away. The doctor given me some tablets, but i refuse to use them as i dont want to relie on tablets my whole life.

    Weeks went by after learning about what i had and what it involves and reading comments from people who had it and actually becoming open with my problems and actually letting people know how i feel, has actually made me feel a little better from when i first found out what i had. Time will only heal its self. Everyday is different some days i have good days, some days i have bad, but i know i am getting better slowly but surley. I have accepted the fact i have an Anixety Disorder and i know it will go, not fully maybe, but just enough to cope.

    Thinking positive and forgetting about the past and just remembering the good memoires and no focusing on the futrue, but living for today. Just tell your self, you can fight these fears no matter how long its going to take, you will beat them. You’re not alone, there is always somebody to talk to, and its not just you that is going though this. You’re not going mental, its just your mind playing tricks. I wish every single one of you good luck. Time is the biggest healer.
    Not really good with advise but thought i’d share my experience and what i’m still experiencing every now and then. Hope this helps.
    Live Strong!

  66. Xena Says:

    Hey, so I’m 18 years old and I just haven’t been myself for about 3 months now. It’s scary because I want the old me back. I can say that I’m recovering slowly because some days I’ll wake up feeling terrible and in a dream like state and other days i will be ok and happy. Some times during the day I’m completely out of it. I will have a fast heart rate, shaking and derealization. I go on google to find things to calm me down. I’m really scared I just want my old self back. I’m alone right now at the mall and I feel like a zombie as if everyone is staring at me :( is this anxiety? Am I ok. I feel like I’m going to die very soon someone help me please!

  67. connor Says:

    hello there im connor

    19 months ago i left a place i was happy had everything done for me im (19 now) and it all suddenly went all at once i had to start buying food paying bills, i panicked and got my self into debt wasnt looking after my body or anything,,

    one day my eyes went, really weird like they could not focus, i was blinking tried to ignore it, 18 months on after many eye tests its still the same,

    im allways overthinking what if,
    i think things look weird, or is this sycological?
    my heart beats fast, i get cold and sweaty,

    for nearly 4 years being truthfull i have not done anything constructive and for 2 years not eaten 3 meals a day never have fruit or vegetables or engadge in actvitied, i miss simple things in life, and when were not depressed and anxious we take far to much for granted, im the sort of person to worry about taking medication and seeking help,

    if i get into work and get a propper wage, propper sleep water and meals,? will i be able to self heal, when i went to the doctor he said, its depression do i want medication but he suggested i get into work and occupy my self rarther than having hours to talk to my self, and overthink

    im writing this for reassurance,

    will this feeling ever go? will i be “normal” will my eyes be normal” im glad im not alone but i am 24/7 with my eyes :(

  68. Carlos Says:

    I feel horrible each and every day i get this anxiety attack that is like waves on and off for about two hours, my headache gets worse i feel like passing out the more i get scare the worse that i feel this has been going on for about two months, every day is a struggle but now I’m learning that relaxing your brain and not thinking to much or worrying helps me a little bit, hopefully i get well soon and those who have anxiety attacks like i do just live life with a lot of exercise fun activities and talking to someone whom you could trust can make you feel a lot better even tho it won’t go away permanently, may god be with me and everyone else, AMEN

  69. Alan Says:

    One of the most difficult aspects is that the anxiety can be triggered by smell. However our brain can learn to pretend that a specific smell no longer exists (even though it still notices it). For example if you live in a house with cats you may not know there is any smell but visitors will. So these mysterious attacks of anxiety can be triggered by a smell that has an association to your subconscious mind even though your conscience mind doesn’t even acknowledge it’s existence.

  70. lizzi Says:

    i highly recomend anyone suffering anxiety or panic to try magnesium supplement i have tryed floraxis magnesium supplement it really helps google it and research it if it will help i hope it dose best of luck to all xxx

  71. Brian Montenegro Says:

    I can relate to so many of you i cant believe im not alone sometimes i feel like its just me that feels this way i know im not crazy but sometimes it gets to me feeling that every sensation i feel in my body is lethal and that all these symptoms i feel will never.go away nit than i remember the things paul says in his book i even though something inside tells me its something else i know.its not i know i have anxiety and.that ill get better i just got to.have patience and stop.worrying and getting scared over everything god bless and well all get through this, anxiety is normal remember that and just live life everyday like if.you.dont have it but.know its there but do anything and everything you want

  72. xavier Says:

    Hi can someone help me to I suffer real bad with anxiety on nights mainly thinkin about my 3 year old I panic n get gut rot n also shakes etc I think bad things are going to happen to my child and I hate the feeling. I go to work on a morning and around 4, 5ish time It kicks in with me and im texting my partner till I finish.. get back to me please

  73. louise Says:

    This webpage and book as always helped me when I have suffered from anxiety. It has really been the main Source of understanding and help.

    I can relate to so many of the posts here, and all of the different thoughts and feelings we alll have.
    For me the way forward has always been to read about and understand anxiety – then just live With it. I do not let it bring me too much Down or make me feel too worried, I let it “fight its own” Battle. If I find myself worrying or getting caught up in nonsene thinking, I sort of let “the nonesense take over” and sit back and let it act itself out. I know that all that worrying has nothing to do with me as a person or as an individual, but is simply random thoughts and bouts of energy that need a release. I know that for everything I feel is O.K, because I am O.K and there is nothing wrong With me. If I do get caught up in worrying or a spiral of anxiousness, I listen to Music, talk to a friend or do something Nice. That allows me to be ok With the feelings being there while still doing something I enjoy.

    I think one important thing to do is to let Your mind worry, let it play out whatever scenario and scenes it wants to. Let it make up crazy horror stories in Your head, and do not try to stop it. You have to adopt a sort of pragmatic way of seeing anxiety and negative feelings. They are there, but only for a little amount of time, then they go again.

    Also, do not try to make yourself feel different, just get used to whatever mood you are in and try to get lost in whatever you are doing.
    There is no radical change needed, just a more laid back and chilled Outlook on whatever storm is going on inside you. I ve had two panic attakcs and have stopped having them, however I am still experienceing a spinning mind. These are just some of the ways I cope With anxiety :)

    Remember that thoughts are thoughts and they are simply energy running around, as Paul said, pay no attention to them and let them flow.

    X

  74. NJ Says:

    I just recently started with anxiety after my first surgery and have been struggling to find positive thoughts and comments that you can get through it. I am so grateful

  75. NJ Says:

    Have been doing the similiar being OCD so to speak on how I can get better, now going to follow some suggestions on how to let that go even though its not going to be easy. I have got a plan together and have started walking first inside the mall and today a big plunge to the outside track so i can get sunshine. It does seem to help but I can’t walk all day so I now am going to work on setting up other ways to get through the day without dwelling on anxiety and how I can fix it, that only makes it worse

  76. sharon Says:

    Hi. I am new to the site so forgive me if i don’t make much sense. I feel as tho i’m losing my mind & that my brain isn’t functioning right. Feel on edge most of the time & sleeping very little which is obviously doing me more harm. I recently lost a very dear friend to leukaemia & am putting this ‘ breakdown’, which is what i feel i am having down to. Used to have panic attacks in my late teens but apart from a bad relapse in 2003, when i was depressed, since then have been very happy & healthy. I managed to get myself out of the depression without medication & only 1 visit to a therapist..but don’t remember how i did. I feel now as tho this bout of whatever it is, is much worse than anything i’ ve ever felt & that i’m never going to get out of it. Like a vicious circle of never ending thoughts of ‘i’m not in control of my mind’ & can’t think normal everyday thoughts. Constant thinking that what is wrong with my mind & brain. Before this crept upon me & i vowed i would never let myself feel anxious or depressed ever again, i was a very confident & happy person. I have the best husband, family & friends in the world. So absolutely no reason for me to feel like this & i hate myself for allowing this to happen to me. Does anyone else feel this way & what can i do to get out of it? I’ ve been to see a Dr & he said i’m depressed & put me on 15mg mirtazapine. Is it depression or anxiety or both? Feel trapped in my own mind & body..if that makes sense to anyone. Thinking of downloading Paul’s book, as will try anything. Am i the only person feeling like this? Please help

  77. lakendra Says:

    I am 19 years old i was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder on thanksgiving day 2015 , i would go all day thinking about what ifs, heart racing, break out in sweats, no appetite , just worry about nothing , i want this feeling to really go away because its scaring me terribly i cant even focus straight , and the negative comments of death really scares me , just please help me i want my life back , and its also scaring me knowing that i am stressed and i try not to be .I just want the crazy thaughts to end …i dont want to have a heartattack ,high blood pressure, or blood to rush to my heart i need HELP !! Im to young for this to take over my life i want my life back !! Even the cloudy and rainy weather scares me and it never did before :( I just be wanting to cry all the time????

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